If you’re still sitting around and waiting to receive an invite code to BlueSky, that means you’re probably still on Twitter, and you’ve noticed the amount of women recently posting tweets that contain the hashtag #GirlMath. It’s a hashtag that has been around since last month, and achieved the majority of its popularity on TikTok, but it hasn’t stopped female Twitter users from sharing their thoughts on #GirlMath, and how it applies to their own lives.
Yes, I can hear all five of you readers asking, “Okay, but what exactly is #GirlMath? What does it mean?”
Girl Math is basically women making questionable spending decisions with their money and taking a “You only live once” approach to how that money is spent, especially if that spending is done with cash. It’s also using calculations when it comes to certain choices in your life that will help convince you that the decision you’re making is the right one. Here are a few examples of Girl Math, and how it works.
The girl math was mathing at the end 🥰♬ original sound - Ashley.holz
Girl math… making all her appointments on the weekdays during work hours on the clock so she doesn’t waste her days off.— Cutty (@passport_cutty) September 27, 2023
What’s yalls favorite form of girl math? Mine is eating what I want Friday-Sunday cause calories don’t count on the weekend— Panic! At The TL (@Puff_Iya) September 17, 2023
If 6 of y’all went out then 4 of you are really cheap cuz only 2 of you had dinner I found your credit card receipt https://t.co/bBhQWqKb7R— ✨Glitch McConnell ✨ (@Glamazon1026) September 25, 2023
Keep in mind that #GirlMath is not supposed to be taken seriously and that it’s largely comprised of women making jokes about themselves, their spending habits, and their lives in general. That didn’t stop some people from taking the hashtag a little too seriously, and those who weren’t in on the joke saw #GirlMath as simplistic and misogynistic. They also saw it as a clear example of women downplaying their own intelligence and independence to simply get laughs and social media clout. The people who made the most noise and complained the loudest about the #GirlMath hashtag? Yes, you already knew the answer before you even finished reading that last sentence.
Whether it’s about Scandal, Empire, the Silhouette Challenge on TikTok, women-only gyms, women-only screenings of Wonder Woman, Taylor Swift, or Beyoncé, if women are shown to be enjoying themselves and having a good time about something, there will always be a man or two who show up in their uniforms as proud members of the Fun Police, complain about the good time those women are having, and immediately do what they can to ruin it all by not shutting the f-ck up and not minding their own business. In this case, they decided to take advantage of the #GirlMath hashtag and crack their own jokes about how women make decisions with their money and their personal lives that … well, don’t even come close to being funny, and simply come off as dumb, misogynistic, and downright cruel.
Examples of this? Women getting ten abortions, and then claiming they don’t have any kids? That’s Girl Math.
Women dating a man with four baby mamas, but ending up as Baby Mama #5 because you thought he’d actually change for you? That’s Girl Math.
Yeah, let me give you a minute or two to get all of the laughter out of your system after reading that.
But you know what happens when men refuse to shut the f-ck up and mind their own damn business when they see women having fun? They are quickly and mercilessly reminded by those women that shutting the f-ck up is always free, and that a lot of them aren’t nearly as funny or smart as they think they are. Which is why we got the hashtag #BoyMath.
What is Boy Math, and what are examples of it? Glad you asked. According to many of the women on Twitter, #BoyMath is…
Watching your dad walk out of your life and abandon you, but hating the mother and the sisters who stuck around to love you and raise you. Not wanting to date any golddiggers, even though you yourself have no gold to be found anywhere, and can barely afford a chopped cheese sandwich at your local bodega. Driving a luxury car, but getting mad at having to pay more than $20 for child support. Bragging about how cryptocurrency is awesome and it’s the future, when you barely have any money in your bank account. Giving unsolicited advice on filmmaking to a female writer-director who has won awards for her work when you’ve failed all your Film Studies classes. Knowing the age of consent in every country. Waiting for certain girls to turn 18 before hitting on them, and thinking that doesn’t make you a pedophile.
Wanting threesomes and polyamorous relationships when you can barely even satisfy one woman. Being the proud owner of a 70-inch television, but you have only two other pieces of furniture in your home. Knowing women who have been sexually assaulted, but claiming that you don’t possibly know or interact with any men who have committed sexual assault or harassment. Wanting zero kids, but carrying around zero condoms. Being a 51-year-old comedian who marries his 24-year-old girlfriend after 6 years of dating. (Yes, you read that correctly.) Paying $44 billion to buy a company that’s worth $25 billion, and causing its value to drop all the way to $8 billion. Accusing women of being emotional and taking things too personally, when it’s men who inflict acts of domestic violence and murder on women over and over and over again, and it’s men who get angry and punch holes in the nearest wall like Adam Driver in Marriage Story if their favorite sports team doesn’t win a game.
This girl math vs boy math thing will go down in the history books as proof that women are literally so much funnier than men 😭😭😭😭— ✨Nai-Jelee✨ (@theeglamnaija) September 26, 2023
My god, that boy math trend is so dark and unsettling.— Ukamaka Olisakwe; Or, Ngalakwesili (@MsOlisakwe) September 26, 2023
Do it again.
Yeah, the girlies weren’t f-cking around at all with the #BoyMath hashtag. Women were laughing while nodding their heads in agreement while reading every tweet (because really, where’s the lie in anything being said?), and men were complaining that these women were taking things too far, and lashing out because they were bitter about men and didn’t know how to take a joke.
The ironing is delicious! pic.twitter.com/KFE9UYCaRO— hr Reaction Videos (@HrReaction) June 24, 2022
Even Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez got in on the fun, and shared her own example of Boy Math while commenting on the government shutdown expected to happen at the end of the week:
Boy math is needing 15 attempts to count the votes correctly to become Speaker and then shutting down the government 9 months later— Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@AOC) September 27, 2023
There are many, many, many more tweets under the #BoyMath hashtag calling men out on their bullsh-t and on their atrocious treatment of women. And it didn’t take long for other tweets to start cracking jokes about Black Math, White Math, and Black Mom Math, proving once more that Black Twitter is ninety percent of the reason why Twitter remains awesome and tolerable, despite Fake-Ass Tony Stark doing everything possible to ruin the app, and show that he’s just as good at running the company as he is at naming his children. And every single one of those tweets should serve as a reminder to men that when they see women having fun with one another and enjoying themselves? Unless you’re going to contribute to the fun they’re having, and not say or do anything to ruin it?, Shut the f-ck up, and stay out of women’s business! Because those same women who you think are silly and stupid for how they choose to have fun will read you to complete and utter filth every time, and they will make you wish you had followed the advice being offered in this song: