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Did Arnold Schwarzenegger Just Make An Interesting Movie? 'Maggie' Trailer

By Emily Cutler | Videos | May 6, 2015 |

By Emily Cutler | Videos | May 6, 2015 |

Maybe it’s not actually an interesting movie. But Arnold definitely made a movie that could be cut down to roughly 2 interesting minutes. And I’m not sure how I feel about that.

See, Arnold and I now have the same relationship that my dog and I had when she was fighting a kidney infection. She’s an older dog, and the medication made her already weakened bladder control even worse. While she was on it, we had several mishaps and a couple of full blown accidents before we finally worked out a system. She was no longer allowed on the couch, but I’d supply her with all of the old towels she needed to make a bed on the floor. Her accidents still happened, but they wouldn’t affect me too much.

And so goes with me and Arnold. He could still piss out all of the terrible movies he wanted to, and I could mostly ignore them.

Unfortunately I did notice this.

Yes, it’s about zombies, and the zombie genre is ridiculously over-saturated. And it also has the “Man Out to Protect His Family” trope. But (Arnold’s dye job aside) it doesn’t look terrible, right? It could be interesting to see not just how one man deals with the inevitable loss of his daughter, but the entire country reasonable responds to a zombie outbreak. Like Contagion but interesting.

And if it does suck we can just banish Arnold back to the towel bed.