By Kristy Puchko | Twitter | January 5, 2017 |
By Kristy Puchko | Twitter | January 5, 2017 |
We’ve previously shared how the coming out of Alex Danvers on Supergirl gave a baby gay a great role model when she needed it most. But LGBTQA+ representation doesn’t only positively impact those represented. That’s the heartwarming lesson culled from one woman’s regrettable in-flight fight with a bigot, and the cathartic conversation that followed. It’s an emotional rollercoaster. Join us.
In her Twitter bio, Dened Rey identifies herself as “Feminist. Latina 🇨🇺🇵🇷. American 🇺🇸. TV Lover. Inhaler of Coffee. Screenwriter of strong female characters.”
Here’s her story, with our feels in gif outbursts.
So, yesterday on my flight to Vancouver I was watching Supergirl, more specifically, the episode where Alex comes out to Kara.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
I had headphones on but I was watching it with subtitles, which I do a lot because is hard for me to understand spoken English sometimes.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
After Kara tells Alex to go get the girl, I feel a tap on my shoulder. I pause, the guy next to me is trying to get my attention.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Guy tells me I'm being inconsiderate & disrespectful because there are kids on that flight. I shouldn't expose them to the "gay abomination"
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
For the record: this dude is so fearful of the gay contamination menace he worries some child on the flight will read a coming out scene from a popular television show and—boom—become corrupted. That’s his mindset.
I point out that the audio is off, but even so, there's nothing wrong with kids being exposed to queer characters, queer heroes, on TV.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
He says it's wrong, I tell him that many kids are already queer and that I'm sure they are happy to see their sexuality represented in TV.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
All the snaps for you, Dened.
He gets upset, calls me "one of them disgusting dykes" and "a fucking n*****". Then tells the flight attendant he must switch seats ASAP.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
I usually don't let those things get to me, but I was already emotional for leaving my home and my family behind, so I got visibly upset.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
I would have been rage-crying all over him by now.
She asks me what's wrong, I tell her the guy is attacking me with racial slurs and homophobic comments; the woman behind me backs me up.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Guy outright tells the FA that he absolutely can't stand sitting next to someone as filthy as me. Ofc, I'm livid, so are those around me.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
FA says she'll solve the problem and leaves, then she comes back and tells me I've been upgraded to 1st class, free of charge.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Guy is outraged, FA claps back, "You wanted her gone, so she is. Stop disrupting the flight or you'll have the police waiting upon landing."
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
So, basically, this guy wanted the First Class seat for causing a ruckus and spewing hate speech?
I get to 1st class, I'm still livid, so I take my laptop out and keep watching Supergirl because I can, I love the show and fuck homophobia.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
After Alex & Maggie kiss, I notice the woman next to me staring at my screen so I brace to have yet another argument. Thankfully, I'm wrong.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
She asks if I like Supergirl, I tell her it's one of my favourite shows. She tells me her daughter loves it & actually got her to watch it.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
She asks if I'm alright, I tell her no - I'm still angry - then tell her what happened. Once I'm done, she tells me Supergirl helped her.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Cause her BFF of 35 years came out to her as a lesbian and at first, she just wouldn't accept it. It went against her beliefs. It was wrong.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
But watching Alex Danvers' journey with her daughter "who, mind you, I'm sure she's a little bit gay" helped her understand her best friend.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
She told me she saw her best friend's struggles reflected in Alex. That Alex allowed her to understand what her friend was going through.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
And basically thanks to Supergirl she got past her own prejudice and wrongful belief and now their friendship is stronger than ever.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
She also told me she joined a group for parents of LGBTQ kids cause she wants to be ready and supportive when her daughter comes out to her.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
It was a happy coincidence that I got to meet such a kind and understanding human being after experiencing a very uncomfortable situation.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
I'm happy to know that shows like Supergirl are out there, helping people be more compassionate & better informed about the LGBT community.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
I'm thankful for Alex's journey, for Maggie's kindness, for their positive impact and for how great @chy_leigh and @florianalima both are.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Mostly, I'm thankful for @AliAdler and @SupergirlStaff for telling such a compelling and extraordinarily heartfelt coming out story in SG.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Stories like the one I got to hear is why fair representation matters. It's why LGBT fans deserve better. It's why I want to be a TV writer.
— Dened Rey (@Hajabeg) January 4, 2017
Props to Dened for not backing down from a bigoted, bullying busy-body, then sharing her story (first in person, then on Twitter) to allow others to learn from it. Props to the flight attendant who gave her the upgrade, and took the time to throw shade at the super-sensitive homophobe. And props to the stranger who showed the courage to share her story, her vulnerability, and her growth.