Zach Braff's 'French Girl' Brings Some Real 2004 Romcom Vibes to 2024

By Dustin Rowles | TV | August 28, 2024 |

A movie called French Girl starring Zach Braff apparently opened in theaters back in March. I say “apparently” because I’d never heard of the film, there’s no Wikipedia page for it, and no box-office information is available. It is, however, currently free on Prime Video. If you love Braff or Vanessa Hudgens, well, honestly, it’s still not a particularly good use of your time.

I like Zach Braff, and Scrubs remains my all-time favorite comedy. I don’t even begrudge him for blocking us on social media after I criticized his Kickstarter idea over a decade ago (if I were famous, I too would block critics). In French Girl, Braff is at his Braffiest, which is both amusing and cringey.

The thing about French Girl is that it feels like a romantic comedy that’s been sitting on a shelf for the last twenty years. Somehow, the characters played by Zach Braff, Vanessa Hudgens, and the rest of the cast also aged two decades while the film collected dust. It’s basically a more genial Meet the Parents, only the fiancée’s parents are French Canadian and the ex-boyfriend is an ex-girlfriend. To the film’s credit, this aspect is played completely straight, which is the only surprising thing in a film that feels like it’s from 2004.

The setup is this: Braff plays Gordon, a high school teacher in Brooklyn. He’s in love with his girlfriend Sophie (Evelyne Brochu), a chef being considered for an executive position at her now-famous ex-girlfriend Ruby’s (Hudgens) restaurant. The interview/audition is a several-day affair, so Sophie brings Gordon to meet her family, who raise lamb outside Quebec City.

In typical sitcom fashion, Gordon does everything wrong from the very beginning. He mixes the wrong pill with alcohol on the flight, arriving to meet the parents incoherently drunk and forced to use a wheelchair. The situation only worsens: He makes a bad impression on the father (Luc Picard); the grandmother—who has dementia—kisses him on the mouth, confusing him for her late husband; and he makes an ass of himself due to jealousy over Sophie’s ex, Ruby.

For silly rom-coms like these to work, it often requires the boyfriend — who is mostly a daffy but lovable mess — to be a complete jerk at some point to create the necessary tension. Being grumpy at big events or accusing your girlfriend of sleeping with her ex-girlfriend to get the job doesn’t play well in 2024, even if a character is shit-faced. Consequently, the romance in the already flimsy comedy completely falls apart, despite William Fichtner’s scene-stealing appearances as Gordon’s conspiracy-minded father (Fichtner’s brief screentime is easily the best part of the film). It doesn’t help that the screenplay feels as though it’s written for a couple considerably younger than Braff and Brochu.

It’s not a good movie, and most of the comedy is more uncomfortable than funny, though the cast does their very best to channel a 2004 rom-com. That said, it’s not a hard watch and isn’t entirely unpleasant. It’s amiable and suitable for background viewing while making dinner or folding laundry, but in no way should it command your full attention.