This Week's 'SNL' Unnecessarily Reminds Us that Jennifer Lopez is Ridiculously Hot

By Dustin Rowles | TV | December 8, 2019 |

By Dustin Rowles | TV | December 8, 2019 |

Lunch Cafeteria — The Cold Open is parodying the world leaders making fun of Trump this week. Paul Rudd comes on to play Macron, James Corden is Boris Johnson, and Jimmy Fallon is Trudeau, and they won’t let Trump (Baldwin) sit at their lunch table. It’s not a bad cold open — and honestly, James Corden steals it as Boris Johnson, the picked-upon cool kid — but it’s strange that there are barely any SNL cast members in this SNL skit. At least, Kate McKinnon appears briefly to play Angela Merkel. (Score: 5 out of 10)

Jennifer Lopez Monologue — J. Lo comes out in a slick-ass tuxedo, recounts her terrific year, reminds everyone that she’s 50 damn years old, and then sings “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” with the Rockettes before ripping off her tux to reveal an exquisite dress beneath. Not bad, J. Lo. Not bad at all. (Score: 7 out of 10)

HGTV Suprise Home Makeover — Lopez and Mikey Day play a husband and wife couple who win a surprise home makeover, and the whole joke is: “How did this guy land her?” She’s gorgeous, he collects Smurfs. What the hell? There’s more mileage here than you otherwise might think, mostly thanks to Kenan. (Score: 7 out of 10)

Roadie — Pete Davidson’s Chad recurs (“OK”), and he nearly breaks up J. Lo and A. Rod (who makes a cameo appearance) (“OK”). Chad, as always, is a metaphor for Pete Davidson (“OK”). (Score: 6 out of 10)

The Corporal — With a suitor coming, two sisters (Aidy Bryant and Kate McKinnon) fight over who is the prettiest, but the third sister played by Lopez has been sheltered all her life and told that she’s ugly. It’s ultimately another skit about how unbelievably hot Jennifer Lopez is, which I’m sure is flattering, but it’s a little limiting. Like, she turned in an Oscar-worthy performance earlier this year. She should be able to play more than one-joke characters where that one joke is, “Damn! She’s a smoke show.” On the other hand, “Damn! She’s a smoke show!” At least, she’s in on the joke. (Score: 6.5 out of 10)

Them Trumps — Trump could kill a man in Times Square and get away with it, but not if he were Black. The novelty of this recurring skit has worn out its welcome. (Watch Here) (Score: 4 out of 10)

Weekend Update — “Update” is a fastball down the middle tonight: Good, but unsurprising. Kate McKinnon does a segment as Nancy Pelosi (watch here) praying for Donald Trump, while Beck Bennet plays a character who “sees things a little bit differently.” Bennet’s character (watch here) is excruciatingly bad, but the rest of “Update” is solid. (Score: 6.5 out of 10)

Christmas Carolers — J.Lo, Chris Redd, Pete Davidson, and Kenan go to white people’s houses and sing “hip-hop Christmas carols” and shakedown the homeowners for donations. Good concept, but the skit falls woefully flat. (Watch Here) (Score: 3 out of 10)

Hoops — J. Lo and Melissa Villaseñor sell hoop earrings in a local commercial. A lot of energy and some decent lines, but ultimately a mediocre skit. (Watch Here) (Score: 5 out of 10)

Potty PM — A product that allows men to pee in the middle of the night without having to get out of bed. It seems like another bad SNL commercial until it does a turn halfway through when it becomes apparent the contraption is not equipped for women, mostly because men don’t know how lady pee-pees work. (This one is tonight’s Mat special). (Score: 6.5 out of 10)

Hardware Store — Ooof. Maybe the show should go back to “Jennifer Lopez is hot” skits, because “Jennifer Lopez is a Wisconsin trucker-wife” isn’t working. (Watch Here) (Score: 3 out of 10).

Barry’s Boot Camp — Here’s a bunch of people delivering increasingly silly motivational speeches during a boot camp exercise class. “Have you ever been cheated on? It sucks! Just ask my girlfriend!” There’s a few good lines, and Bowen Yang gets a featured opportunity, but the skit is mostly blergh. (Watch Here) (Score: 4 out of 10)