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The 5 Worst Things to Ever Happen on ‘True Blood’

By Nadia Chaudhury | TV | August 18, 2014 |

By Nadia Chaudhury | TV | August 18, 2014 |


Yup, I’m one of the few people who’s still watching True Blood, and nope, I don’t have a good reason. I’m just one of those people who once they start watching something, they have to finish it. (Likewise, I saw Dexter all the way to its lumberjack-y end.) With next Sunday’s True Blood series finale in mind, I forced myself to remember all the ridiculous things that have happened on this show, and picked out the five worst.

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1. Sookie’s disregard for Alcide when it comes to Bill
Hey, Sookie? Remember Alcide, your boyfriend who died two episodes ago? You sure? I just want to remind you, since, y’know, you seemed to have one hard night during that big party celebrating life and you talked to Arlene about moving on and all that, but then, you had the same heartwarming conversation with Arlene after Bill refused to drink Sarah’s blood and only the good die…wait, who’s this Alcide fellow again?

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2. When Vampire Bill was Vampire God
Even though watching vampires frolicking high on Lilith’s blood was fun, the whole Billith thing was ridiculous. Bill as the vampire god? C’mon.

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3. The Iraqi Curse Plot
While it was nice having Scott Foley on the show (or any show, really), the curse plotline was unnecessary filler, though I suppose that’s true of 74% of the entire show.

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4. The Orgy Meat Tree
Again, that’s “Orgy Meat Tree.” Nuff said.

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5. Werepanthers
I get that this is a world where fantastical things live and magical nonsense happens, but you already have werewolves and shapeshifters. Did werepanthers really need to exist? And did they really have to try to rape Jason? If someone can make a supercut of True Blood that’s just have Pam and Eric banter and Jason and Eric sex dreams, I’d be much obliged.

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Nadia Chaudhury once dressed up as Sookie for Halloween.