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'Galavant' GIF Recap: WTF With That Finale?!

By Kristy Puchko | TV | January 26, 2015 |

By Kristy Puchko | TV | January 26, 2015 |

When we began this GIF celebration of Galavant, I shared my fears that this comedy-musical/medival-adventure would be too weird for ABC to keep around, and that they’d kill it too soon like they kill so many shows I love. (R.I.P. Pushing Daisies. I’ll never forget you Happy Endings!) Over the course of the show’s 8-episode, 4-night run, many of you said you couldn’t imagine this mini-series would make it to a season two. It’s just too unicorn, right? Well, last night ABC teased the need for a second season, but with no assurance we’ll get one.


But I’m getting ahead of myself. Up against the SAG Awards, Galavant gave us “My Cousin Izzy” and “It’s All In The Executions,” digging into some backstory, presenting Gal’s macho dad—HOLY SHIT THAT’S GILES!


From there, we pick up with Galavant’s gang as prisoners of Madalena and her new beau/King Richard’s bullying older brother Kingsley (Rutger Hauer because naturally). She is generous only in her collars and shade throwing (“My former boy toy/jester who was cuter pre-dungeon aaaaaannnnnnnd not sure who the black kid is.”)


“I’ll miss our banter.” The would-be kings decide to face off in a duel to the death! Well, they decide to bring in champions, because kings are cowards—or so this and Game of Thrones has taught me. But Kingsley snatches Gareth from Richard! And Galavant’s to fight for the king he despises.


“Take the offer to be my shag hag.” Stealing that.


GODDAMN IT! I want a battle! I am owed a battle. Who’s this runt? Oh. Isabella’s cousin/child bride-groom.


Daisy does deadly: “Each blue blood will spew blood, a happy ending for us!” This is the most charming murder song ever. Tra la la la!


I’m rooting for everyone. Madalena (I like her moxie), Richard (dude makes me laugh), the homicidal help (peasant love 4eva), and Galavant and his gang (natch). HOW CAN THIS ENDING TO SATISFY!? (Spoilers: It won’t even try.)


“(Your type of hero) is the only type of hero I want to be.” And just like that little Prince Harry quits mad quick. I’m glad and yet it feels mad cheap. The cook is found out. Swapsies and now King Richard has to face off against Gareth. More and more this show is racing to shove in plot points, like they’re wedging a 13-episode arc into 8.


We’re into the last episode of the season and it seems there’s still a lot of terrain to tackle—OMG! Kiss kiss KISS! Oh COME ON!


Guy gossip times! “Oh that’s an interesting proposition. A little guy time between frenemies both burnt by the same flame. Bros before hoes, all that.”


Is it weird that when he offered King Richard that drink, part of me wanted to see Galavant crawl into his bed?


“I’m not an animal! I mean sure, I’ll kidnap a woman and force her to marry me. But after that I’m all about a woman’s rights. I’m a modern 13th century man!…I’ve never actually walked in anyone’s garden…I’m sorry I barked at you. This is why I don’t have guy friends.” Timothy Omundson for all the Emmys.


Not enough musical numbers are drunken. “Secret! Secret! Hush hush HUSH!”


King Richard is very handsome. I want to bite his beard.


“Nice kiss, I hope he remembers it!”


We seemed poised at long frakkin’ last for a big swashbuckling epic battle! Then another. Then another! But much like Galavant’s song, we keep getting thwarted. IF we get a season two, ABC better pony up the money for at least ONE sword-swinging showdown.


“If one hair on his head gets harmed, I will hunt you down. I will gut you. And I will use your skin as a lap blanket.” Gareth shows love through threatening. So much threatening.


“You’re going to either lose or gain a lot of weight.” Madalena is cold-blooded!


“Everyone say bye-bye to Izzie” because she’s being locked into a doll house.


“Our season ends right there with Questions everywhere!”


WTF! In what world is that a finale? Considering ABC’s track record for new shows, I am full-on furious I watched this at all. If they wanted to spur outcry for a season two, I wish they would have done it while giving us an actual conclusion to season one. Not this cliffhanger upon cliffhanger upon cliffhanger!


Escuse me. I need some me time now.


Random lines that made me LOL:

“If I named you, I could get attached.”

“Break a leg.” “For you, princess, I might break both of his.”

“If you eat that last Danish, I will reach down your throat, pull it out, and beat you to death with it!”

“I think you need to start acting like a man and stop acting like a king.”

“Your breath reminds me of the time I found my uncle’s body in a well.”

“Are you worried about me Gare-Bear?”

“You’re so pretty. But not just your face, your brain. It’s like your beautiful brain exploded all over your face.”

“It’s like a buddy trip. Buddy fable like those books. Good times.”

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Kristy Puchko is the managing editor of Pajiba. You can follow her on Twitter.