Fred Armisen Has a New Alternative To Valentine's Day

By Andrew Sanford | TV | February 7, 2023 |

By Andrew Sanford | TV | February 7, 2023 |

I learned a valuable lesson thanks to Valentine’s Day when I was in High School. One year, I surprised my then-girlfriend. I got members of the chorus we were in to get her into the music room. I surprised her by singing along to “Hooked On A Feeling” by Blue Suede, accompanied by lyric-specific candy, in front of “everyone.” She loved it. My adolescent brain assumed I could coast for a few years. I was wrong.

A massive snowstorm pummeled my small town the following year. My girlfriend lived about a ten-minute drive away from me (very far, in Western Mass terms), and I could not drive (yet). Even if I could, there was a blizzard going on. I assumed we wouldn’t see each other until school later that week. I was wrong again. What ensued was my mother driving me through a storm, first to the grocery store so I could buy the last chocolates they had. I was dropped off at my girlfriend’s home, where my lack of effort was rightfully admonished.

I made a huge deal out of Valentine’s Day the year before. The next year, I barely even tried. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was in a relationship near its end. My girlfriend understood that because she was more intelligent than me. She got upset, and I learned that if you make a big deal out of something in a relationship, it’s probably a good idea to keep doing that. Extra effort shows that you care.

High school me would have loved Acquaintance Day (I got there!). The “Valentine’s Day alternative” was created by Fred Armisen. On last night’s Late Night with Seth Meyers, he explained what it is. Instead of celebrating the people you love, you acknowledge the people you see now and then. Have you ever run into someone you know on the street, promised to meet them for coffee soon, and then never saw them again? This is the holiday for them!

I can’t fully support an alternative to Valentine’s Day. Without ole Saint Valentine, I wouldn’t have learned a valuable lesson! That said, the low stakes are pretty appealing.