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New Theory: Jack Is Going to Die

By Cindy Davis | TV | April 23, 2010 |

By Cindy Davis | TV | April 23, 2010 |

I might be a genius. Last night as I watched and thought about where the final episodes of 24 might be headed, everything began to make sense. Jack is going to die. I’m 87.325 % certain! First, we had all the media speculation on whether or not this will be the final season - Kiefer made statements that it all depended upon ratings. Next, the movie rumors were trotted out, yet again, but no one paid much attention since we’ve heard them before. But then, Fox announced that indeed, the eighth day will be Jack Bauer’s last. Now all of a sudden we have writers and a director attached to the movie, and yesterday Kiefer said the script is already finished, though he hasn’t read it. Meanwhile, is Kiefer staying in shape and keeping his nose clean so he’ll be ready to work on the film? Nope - he’s out getting drunk and into trouble again. And why is Kiefer going on all these benders, you ask? Because he knows Jack Bauer is dead and there isn’t going to be any film. Our big surprise ending (really it would be the only surprise left) is DeadJack, and Kiefer is depressed because he doesn’t know how to do anything else at this point; he thinks he is Jack Bauer. Oh Kiefer, just be happy you got out of marrying Julia, won’t you?

Jack stares at Renee’s cold (YES!) stiff (nothing new there) lifeless (WHEE!) d-e-a-d body on the gurney, as a nurse tells him she’s sorry, but they need to move Renee (to the underside of a dirt pile!). The nurse asks if Jack is her husband or knows her next of kin (nah, they were just one-night frakbuddies). Jack seems struck by the notion that he has no idea who his blow up doll really was. When the nurse asks if Jack will be all right, he walks away wordlessly. Another nurse gives Jack some new clothes and shoes she got from an intern; he sits and watches Renee get carted off and chokes back his sobs. Come on Jack, buck up! You can do so much better. Chloe phones and says she’s sorry, asks what she can do to help. Jack angrily asks who Renee recognized, and Chloe tries to tell Jack to let CTU handle it but Jack is MAD. Chloe relates that Renee thought she might have known the medic as someone from the Red Square faction and Jack confirms with Chloe this is Bazhaev’s group. Jack demands to know where Bazhaev is and after letting Jack know she’s the new Hastings, Chloe tells Jack that Bazhaev is in federal court, downtown. Jack’s awfully bitchy to Chloe, and she really should know better than to expect Jack to keep his word to stay out of the way of the ongoing investigation. (Maybe she does know better but thinks resistance is futile.)

Ethan shows up for work and brushes off President Taylor’s concerns over his quick return. When he inquires as to the status of Logan’s involvement with the Russians, she tells Ethan that former President Logan is already en route to a meeting with Minister Novakovich. Ethan wants to know what exactly Logan is doing in her name, and the President admits she doesn’t know - “don’t ask, don’t tell” was Logan’s cooperation price. Meanwhile, Logan walks up to Novakovich’s restaurant table. Novakovich begins offering condolences for President Hassan, but Logan tells him to save the bullshit. Logan orders an espresso and begins making accusations against the Russians, including Novakovich himself. Logan says he has proof that the Russians were involved in the importing of nuclear materials and President Hassan’s assassination, and that Novakovich doesn’t want to test him. (Gregory Itzen is deliciously smarmy and sneering in his role as the former President, and frankly, much more fun than our current face-slapping President Taylor.) Logan informs Novakovich that President Taylor has no idea of the truth, and that she never will if Russia agrees to come back to the peace accord.

Papa Bazhaev’s case is before a judge and his defender speaks out as Jack walks into the courtroom, not unnoticed by the mobster. The judge denies bail and after Bazhaev whispers into his lawyer’s ear, the lawyer asks for five minutes with his client. The lawyer then informs Jack that Bazhaev would like to speak with him. As soon as Jack approaches, Bazhaev immediately starts threatening Jack if Jack should dare go near his family. Jack, in turn, demands to know who shot Renee, after explaining that she had recognized someone in the Red Square organization. When Bazhaev says there is no more Red Square, Jack discloses that Renee was family to him (Now you’re really reaching, Jack - the bitch was just a crazy piece of ass.) and threatens Bazhaev’s wife and daughter. Jack starts to walk away and Papa takes the bait. Bazhaev says if he tells Jack, his family will be killed anyway and Jack promises protection. Bazhaev tells Jack that the Russian government is behind the day’s events, and that Dana/Jenny Starbuck “arranged everything”.

In a car, Logan tells his assistant, Jason Pillar (Reed Diamond) that it’s nerve-wracking waiting for a decision. President Taylor phones Logan and lets him know that Russia is ready to sign the peace treaty, and the credit is all his. Ethan, who is with President Taylor wants to know what exactly Logan did or said to bring them back to the table. Logan states that he and President Taylor had an agreement; what’s important is the victory.

Jack calls Chloe to order protection for Bazhaev’s family and tells her that Bazhaev asserted the Russian government in Moscow was behind everything that has happened this day. Jack also informs Chloe he is coming in to speak with Starbuck, as she’s supposed to be Moscow’s go-to girl. After they hang up, Chloe warns Ortiz that Jack might go insane if he thinks Starbuck knows who killed Renee, and asks Ortiz to help keep Jack in check. Of all people, Chloe should know Jack can’t be contained by anyone. Power really does make people stupid, doesn’t it?

Logan and Jason discuss how President Taylor will eventually have to give Logan some credit and that it’s good to back in the game, even if it is through the rear entrance (I’ll let you all have the fun with that line!). Exiting the car, Logan smiles at a security agent and gets only a scowl in return - he demands Jason get the guy reassigned. Jason tells Logan they have a bigger problem - Jack Bauer. At the mere mention of Jack’s name, Logan physically recoils. Jason informs Logan about Jack’s visit to Bazhaev and that Jack is on his way to interrogate Starbuck. Clearly in on Starbuck’s moleyness, Logan and Jason discuss trying to stop Jack from getting to Starbuck. She hasn’t given up information yet, but if Jack interrogates her, Starbuck could take everyone down. Warning Logan that things could easily get out of hand, Jason suggests that Logan talk to President Taylor, despite the fact that the President will be furious that Logan had inside information he didn’t share. Logan says Jack tried to ruin him and that he won’t let it happen again.

Jack arrives at CTU and Chloe again says how sorry she is about Renee. Jesopus people, these two weren’t married! They barely knew each other - a couple of days at most. Ding dong that bitch is gone, now let’s move on. Chloe and Jack walk to where Starbuck is being held and Ortiz is waiting there, he also gives his condolences. Give it a rest, I say! Chloe says she has to leave on the cameras and Jack declares that if he wanted Starbuck dead, she’d be dead. He’s just going to wake her up to the idea of it. (Nice line.) Jack walks in and Starbuck asks what he wants. Jack tells her he wants to know who killed Renee Walker, and Starbuck says it must have been a mistake - that she’s sorry. Jack’s all, “You’re sorry?” and he goes crazy on Starbuck, slamming her head into the table and then a whack to the left, and a whack to the right! (I don’t normally condone violence against women, but this was clearly some fun and fake head slapping - well done, Katee!) Chloe tells Ortiz to stop Jack but Ortiz says to let it play out. After another smack, Starbuck claims she can give names, Jack wants more than names, he wants proof. Starbuck says she has proof, an audio file and film, but that as soon as she starts talking she’s dead. She needs her immunity deal back and sneers, “Your move, Jack.” Jack whispers in her ear that if Starbuck lies to him, he’ll find her no matter where she tries to hide.

President Taylor lets Dalia Hassan know that all the delegates have accepted her as the IRK representative, that the last stipulation is her own country’s approval. As the two women congratulate each other, Ethan interrupts to tell the President that Logan needs to speak with her. Logan is in her office watching news accounts of Mrs. Hassan’s attempt to stand in for her husband, and he is advised of President Taylor’s arrival. Logan tells the President and Ethan that Jack Bauer is out of control, that he’s been questioning Bazhaev and is on his way to interrogate Starbuck. When President Taylor asks why Jack wants to talk to Starbuck, Logan tells her of Renee’s murder. Cue shocked, clueless President face, yet again. Logan pleads to have Jack “locked down” and President Taylor demands the truth. Logan tells her that the Russian government is behind everything that has gone on, including President Hassan’s death. Ethan yells at Logan for compromising the President, and then so does President Taylor herself. She threatens that if she finds that Logan had knowledge that could have prevented anything…she doesn’t finish her sentence, but I’d guess there would be slapping. Logan says that Jack has to be kept from questioning Starbuck, because it can’t come out that the Russians have been involved. He argues with Ethan over keeping the knowledge of the Russians quiet to keep the peace agreement intact. Logan gives an impassioned speech about being involved in politics and being able to effect change, make the world a better place. Ethan begs President Taylor not to listen to Logan (poor Ethan’s pleas never work), even as Logan urges her to heed Julius Caesar’s words: It’s now or never. President Taylor is informed that Jack is on the phone wanting her to reinstate Starbuck’s immunity agreement. She tells the adviser to say she’ll have to call Jack back. When Ethan tells President Taylor there is no choice, she tells him there is, and that she is going to CTU to speak with Jack.

Jack asks if President Taylor has called back yet, Chloe tells him she hasn’t. Chloe wants Jack to let CTU take over with Starbuck, and just then, Arlo informs Chloe the President is on the line - but she wants to speak with Chloe, not Jack. The President advises Chloe she’s coming to see Jack and to keep him there. Chloe tells Jack to wait in Hastings’ office. Chloe meets President Taylor and introduces herself, then walks the President into CTU. President Taylor gives the whole CTU gang a little pep talk, telling them to keep up the good work and she heads upstairs alone to speak to Jack. President Taylor adds herself to the “so sorry about Renee” list and says she has something difficult to ask him. She tells Jack she needs him to stand down and not question Starbuck. Jack protests and assures the President that he thinks Starbuck can give further information about Russian government involvement in the day’s events. They argue and the President refuses to give Starbuck immunity or let Jack question her further. Any time Jack mentions Russians, President Taylor emphatically says, You don’t know that!” as if she can will their part in it all away. She tells Jack she has to work toward the greater good of peace, and Jack angrily speaks of nuclear weapons being brought into the country. Jack wants to know if Mrs. Hassan would sign the agreement if she knew her husband’s killers were across the table, but the President continues to fight Jack. President Taylor declares that the peace treaty is in the interests of the United States and the world, making it more important than revenge. Jack says he wants justice, not revenge, but President Taylor wants peace and insists her decision is final. She informs Jack he’ll be brought to McGuire Air Force Base to be debriefed. As Jack walks out, Chloe hands him a box of stuff and asks what happened - Jack tells her nothing happened.

President Taylor orders Chloe to keep Starbuck in custody and to give no one access to her without the President’s approval. When Chloe attempts to discuss Starbuck’s knowledge of the people involved in the day’s occurrences, the President replies that Starbuck is a sociopath who will say anything. Speaking to Chloe as if she’s a moron (“Do you understand, Chloe?”) the President informs Chloe the peace treaty will be signed in a couple of hours and that CTU has security responsibility for the duration. As she’s walking away, the President softens for a moment, letting Chloe know Tim Woods spoke highly of her.

Chloe lets Ortiz know they’re on UN Security detail now and that President Taylor says Starbuck is a liar who will wreck the peace treaty. Ortiz questions what Jack thinks and Chloe lets him know Jack was sent away to be debriefed - Ortiz wonders what is going on and Chloe tells him to get his teams ready. Outside CTU, Jack meets with Agent Winnick (Brad Fleischer) who informs Jack he’s to be transferred to McGuire AFB for questioning. Chloe watches as Jack is being escorted to the nearby helicopter, and she catches on that something is about to happen and instructs Arlo to bring up video. She hears Jack ordering Agent Winnick to surrender the helicopter and Chloe orders a group to the helipad, informing them they have a hostage situation. But they arrive as Jack is already taking off with the helicopter, so Chloe gets on Winnick’s radio and tells Jack his idea is a bad one - she’ll have to call the Air Force and they’ll make him land the helicopter, but Jack flies away anyway. Chloe orders Agent Winnick to call the FAA and the Air Force and tell them they have a helicopter that needs to be intercepted. Once again, Jack’s gone rogue!

For your Enhanced Recap Experience (ERE), please open this link in a new tab and listen to the music while reading the final paragraph.

Why isn’t Jack yelling “Dammit” anymore? What kind of freaky drugs did Renee give Jack to make him think she’s his family? If she’s his family, was that incest? Did Jack catch Renee’s crazy? Who is Logan’s information source and how can he know everything that’s going on before anyone else does? Is he involved? Are Jack and Chloe going to be enemies now? Isn’t that just WRONG? Will President Taylor and Ethan get it on? Will President Taylor and Logan get it on? I saw some sexual tension there, am I the only one? Should Jack die? For these answers and more, please stay tuned to Pajiba until the next recap of As Jack’s World Turns.

Cindy is holed up in a bunker in the northeast sector of the country, and that’s all you need to know. You can reach Cindy here

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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