Welcome To The Trailer Park: Robin Wright And Naomi Watts Are MILFS In Two Mothers And You Stopped Reading, Didn't You?
Yes, Naomi Watts and Robin Wright play moms that bone each other’s sons. They don’t live in a trailer park. That was just a play on the fact that I have a plethora of trailers for you today, dolls. Anyway, Watts and Wright are longtime friends living next to each other on an Australian beach. They get lonely and decide to seek some solace, and wang, from the young men they’ve probably known since babies. Ew. At least they are the sons of their best friend and they are both doing the same thing. I guess?
The next trailer does not feature son-swapping. The Company You Keep is a political thriller starring, and directed by, Robert Redford. Do you remember that episode of “The Simpsons” where Homer’s mom came back to Springfield and we find out she was a member of a radical movement that crossed Mr. Burns? And she fled town to keep Homer safe? Then she returns to town and Mr. Burns brings her past up again? That’s what The Company You Keep sounds like to me, except Susan Sarandon’s character gets caught, Redford goes on the run from his past, and Shia LeBeouf, in a pair of stupid glasses, plays a reporter covering the story.
Let’s bring the intrigue down a notch or fourteen and move on to The Host. If you’ve avoided any information about the movie, then you didn’t read my post yesterday and you have hurt my feelings. GOOD DAY TO YOU. If you did read my post, I think you look terrific and like maybe you got lots of great sleep last night.
The Host has aliens called Souls placing themselves in human bodies. They push out the human host’s consciousness, I guess you could say, in a bid to bring overtake the human race. Melanie Stryder (Saoirse Ronan) refuses to let herself be crushed by the alien invader and fights back. With her consciousness. Not her fists. Also, two boys like her and they are, like, SO CUTE OMG. One loves Melanie and the other is falling in love with the Soul that is crashing in her body. HOW WILL IT EVER WORK OUT?!?!?
Finally, David Cross and
Amber Tamblyn Julia Stiles play a new couple that head to a couples brunch. People start to get weird, bitching about various things, when catastrophe strikes! I like to think that a bunch of studios seriously thought that the world would be ending on December 21, 2012 and greenlit a bunch of “end of the world” themed movies. Then the world didn’t end and they were all right f*cked and had to finish making and then release all of them.