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"You Need to Start Killing, If You Want To Stay Alive"

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Trailers | August 31, 2009 |

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Trailers | August 31, 2009 |

So on one hand we have a first time director (Scott Mann) putting out an independent film that twice ran out of money during its production in the UK. It’s having trouble finding a distributor and might go straight to DVD if they don’t find a deal soon. They managed to land Robert Carlyle to star as a priest caught up in a whirlwind of savagery invading his small town.


On the other hand we have a film about the world’s thirty best assassins (which is controversial, because they use a version of the BCS to determine rankings) invited by a sadistic billionaire to try to kill each other in a small town rigged with CCTV for the enjoyment of him and his buddies. It’s the couch potato version of The Most Dangerous Game. Last one standing gets a pile of money and presumably a trophy of some sort, like little league except instead of the gold plastic dude swinging a bat, it’s a ninja holding aloft a head in triumph, as ninjas are wont to do. Poor innocent guy gets caught in the middle, there’s a hot assassin (Kelly Hu) who tries to help our wayward innocent, and Ving Rhames is in there because any trailer with that many explosions has at least 50/50 odds of having Ving Rhames.


The fact that these are the same film is terribly vexing. I have two hunches. First, my guess is that the film’s twist will be that Robert Carlyle’s character is anything but an innocent priest despite first appearances. Second, this film is going to be epic. To clarify, I’m not saying that it’s going to be good, just that it is either going to be so epically horrible that birds stroke out and fall from the air just flying over the theater, or it’s going to be a guilty pleasure cult hit of Stathamesque proportions.

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Steven Lloyd Wilson is the sci-fi and history editor. You can email him here or follow him on Twitter.