Nope. Nopenopenopenopenopenope.

It’s all wrong. Completely wrong. Now I know why it’s taken so long for The Time Traveler’s Wife to find a release date. Just from the trailer alone, it’s clear that the movie completely clusterfucks the novel’s spirit and tone. It was a romantic book — one of the most romantic I’ve ever read. But there was a heaviness to it. It had some gravity. It may have been mainstream friendly, but it wasn’t this. This light-weight frivolous pablum with a Snow Patrol (?) song playing over it. It wasn’t a bland romantic comedy. It was heartbreaking. Riveting. And a pall of sad inevitability fell over the entire thing.

This is freakin’ Serendipity with a time travel element. I liked Eric Bana and Rachel McAdams for the parts, but this just doesn’t work. It’s all wrong. It’s pear-shaped, people. A sad excuse for a cinematic adaptation. I hope it’s a bad trick played on us by the marketing folks, but I think it’s more likely that director Robert Schwentke (Flightplan) just effed this up horribly.

Pitiful.

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.