Oh, The Latest Underworld 4 Trailer Is Frightful, But Kate Beckinsale Is So Delightful... Let It Blow, Let It Blow, Let It Blow
You may or may not have noticed, but It’s been a “slow news day” since at least Friday, so the latest Underworld: Awakening trailer (a.k.a Underworld 4: Kate Beckinsale Is Back) is being brought to you with some regret. It’s really not close to being as good as any of the trailers that premiered last week, and it only slightly elaborates on the Twilightian plot that the first two trailers already hinted at. But, you know, as someone smarter than me once said: “It’s got leather, Beckinsale, and weaponry.”
What more could you really want, or expect? Even if it is latex, not leather:
Nor would I normally recommend watching this recapping trailer that, er, recaps the previous entries in this moderately entertaining, if unlikely franchise. As if anybody who would pay money to watch a new Underworld movie in the theater would need to be brought up to speed. Still, Kate Beckinsale herself implores that you do watch it, and I’m totally incapable of arguing against her.
I’ll be impressed, and also sad for you, if you can resist her introductory charms:
A friend of mine often likes to say he would “drink (fill in young, attractive female performer of your choice)’s bathwater” to express his appreciation for some women. I’m not saying I’d ever do that, I’m just saying it’s a smart decision to highlight Beckinsale’s return to Selene and the death dealer’s wardrobe. Why else would you watch this?
Rob Payne also writes the indie comic The Unstoppable Force, tweets on the Twitter @RobOfWar, and his ware can be purchased here (if you’re into that sort of thing). He guesses Hulk-ified werewolves might be worth seeing, too (if you’re into that sort of thing).