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Guys, I Found Wesley Snipes. He's Fighting Zombies In The Old West. It... It Doesn't Look Good: The Gallowwalkers Trailer

By TK Burton | Trailers | February 25, 2013 |

By TK Burton | Trailers | February 25, 2013 |

Oh, Wesley. You go from Major League to King Of New York to the Blade trilogy to this?

Here’s a little synopsis for you folks: A cursed gunman (Snipes) whose victims come back from the dead recruits a young warrior to help in the fight against a gang of zombies.. Huh. So there’s that. There’s also the fact that this looks awful. And you may be asking yourself how this movie is possible since Snipes is currently, you know, in friggin’ jail (for real: he’s doing a three-year bit for tax evasion). Apparently this was made before his incarceration, when he was basically hiding out in foreign countries. Which is also why this is a Western filmed in Namibia. But it’s apparently SO GOOD that they were saving it this whole time and are finally going to release it this year (coincidentally, the year Sniperoos is supposed to get out of the pokey).

The film is about a cursed gunman whose victims always come back to life, which forces me to ask… why does he keep killing people? Also, apparently the only way to kill them permanently is to rip off their heads. The trailer is just a three and a half-minute bucket of dumb and crazy:

Is that not enough weird, insane information for you? OK, well, it’s directed by Andrew Goth, who only has two other film credits to his name: 2005’s Cold and Dark, which has this tremendous synopsis:

When Detective Mortimer Shade is somehow killed in a freezer, a parasite called a grail possesses his body, revives him, but he needs blood to stay alive. His partner John Dark accepts the new situation and together they become vigilantes, judging and killing the bad guys, with Shade sucking their blood with his claw. However, Dark notes that Shade is losing the rest of his humanity and becoming a monster, being aware and afraid of the danger Shade represents to mankind and trying to stop him.

Yes, he wrote a character named “Mortimer Shade.” His other project is the hilariously titled B.U.S.T.E.D., which starred drum and bass Dj Goldie and… David Bowie. I haven’t the words for how bizarre that is.

Welcome to a world gone mad.

TK Burton is an Editorial Consultant. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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