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There Is No Day Greater Than New Nic Cage Hair Day

By TK Burton | Trailers | July 26, 2010 |

By TK Burton | Trailers | July 26, 2010 |

I’m not even joking. It’s the only reason I look forward to Nicolas Cage movies anymore — just to see what kind of fucked up pile of spray-painted mutant straw he’ll have atop his big melon full of batshit. It’s the reason I’ll eventually see The Sorcerer’s Apprentice. Nic Cage’s ridiculous, goofy-ass hairstyles are the flame to my moth.

I have no fucking clue what I’m talking about. But I know this: Drive Angry looks painfully stupid, derivative, overdone, and cliched. Seriously, Cage’s bizarre mullet (not quite Con Air territory, but close) is the only remotely interesting thing about this trailer. Well, that and Amber Heard. Nothing was ever hurt by the presence of Ms. Heard.

Truth be told, Drive Angry actually has a pretty interesting cast, including the always-awesome David Morse, the equally-always-awesome William Fichtner, and Charlotte Ross (“NYPD Blue”). But still. It looks silly. Violent and bloody? Yes, and by all accounts it’s supposed to be quite gritty. But director Patrikc Lussier brought us Cursed, My Bloody Valentine 3D,, and Dracula 2000 before this. That’s not exactly a resume filled with promise.

Whatever. Here’s the trailer. Revel in its mullet-ness.

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TK Burton is an Editorial Consultant. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.