film / tv / politics / social media / lists / web / celeb / pajiba love / misc / about / cbr
film / tv / politics / web / celeb


Choose Your Nightmare: Which Of These Three Horror Movie Trailers Makes You Cry Blood?

By TK Burton | Trailers | September 20, 2012 |

By TK Burton | Trailers | September 20, 2012 |

We’ll start with an easy one. This is the trailer for Hold Your Breath, starring Katrina Bowden who is, from what I can understand, very pretty and in some crappy TV show. The premise is a group of attractive young people in the middle of nowhere (I know, right? Totally original) who drive past a graveyard and one of them fails to hold their breath, which as we all know leads to… um… possession by someone super evil.



This next one has a bit more promise. The Collection has a weird Saw meets Human Centipede meets, I dunno, Let’s Get Harry or The Expendables vibe to it. Or Something. It’s about a group of attractive young people (sensing a trend?) who go to one of those crazy rave-like parties that only exist in movies, and get kidnapped by a crazy gimp dude who tortures and traps people. And then there are mercenaries and guns and apparently everything is blueish… Well, in any event, it looks a little more promising than that mess above. It’s directed by the guy who wrote Piranha: 3DD, so, you know, there’s that.

Finally, the one I’m most curious about, the new trailer for Silent Hill: Revelation. Another tiresome 3D affair, but it seems to capture the same moody atmosphere of the first one. The first one is a classic almost-good movie. It’s got gorgeous cinematography, great effects, some solid acting, and writing that varies from solid to atrocious. They’ve traded director Christopher Gans for Michael Bassett (Soloman Kane), and sadly, there will be no Laurie Holden. But there will be more Sean Bean since he (weirdly) didn’t die in the original. I know, right? Anyway, much like 90% of the video games, it looks beautiful and creepy and has a good chance of being fucking terrible. But as with the video games, I’ll be there anyway.

From what I can tell, this is almost exactly the same as the one that released a couple of months ago, so let’s just call it a refresher.

Everything Bad is Good for You by Steven Johnson | Here's Nick Offerman's Slam Poem About Bacon. You're Welcome

TK Burton is the Editorial Director. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.