It’s still just a rumour, but Jodie Whittaker’s Doctor might have just got her new companion: Bradley Walsh. ‘Who?’ I hear you cry? Yes, Doctor Who. Oh, you mean ‘who is Bradley Walsh?’ Right. Gotcha. *Cracks knuckles* I can totally explain Bradley Walsh to Americans.
UK readers: you might want to jump ahead. I might be a while.
You must have seen Law and Order! Oh, wait, he was in Law and Order: UK. Never mind.
He played professional football for a while! Proper football, the one where you use your feet. That’s not helping.
He was on Corrie! Er, Coronation Street. OK, that’s a soap opera here. But not like an American soap opera, where everyone is super hot and they act like Joey Tribbiani. British soaps are kind of bleak and depressing, and compete with each other to be as miserable as possible.
That doesn’t mean he’s miserable though! I mean, he was a Blue Coat, so being jolly was pretty much his job. You know what a Blue Coat is, right? It’s the Pontins version of the Butlin’s Red Coat. Not quite as prestigious, but I can’t really judge; I was a Havenmate for a couple of seasons. (That’s cooler than a Blue Coat, but not as fancy as a Red Coat.) Remember the Yellow Coats of Maplin’s, in Hi-De-Hi? No? Nothing? Look, it’s a British holiday park tradition, OK!
He’s best known at the moment for presenting The Chase. Now this one might be a bit easier to explain. It’s the quiz show where people take on one of the Chasers, like The Governess, The Beast or The Dark Destroyer, in a general knowledge quiz. It often has silly names on it, presumably just to make Walsh say things like Dick Tingeler, Poussey Bush, and Gobbler’s Knob. The Fanny Chmelar one was a classic!
Oh wait — that’s not so funny for you, is it? So you mean ‘butt’ when you say fanny, don’t you? Yeah, that means something different here.
Damn, this isn’t going well.
OK, he’s an actor, a comedian and a TV presenter. Like other companions who appeared in the Whoniverse in a different role first, he was in a couple of episodes of the Doctor Who spin-off The Sarah-Jane Adventures. He’s a popular and well loved figure, but an odd choice for this role. They have used comedians before, most recently with Matt Lucas and Catherine Tate — both of whom I loved — so it could work. I guess. I’m going to try and keep an open mind for now, but my gut reaction is ‘lukewarm’ and ‘not exactly thrilled’.
Let me know your reaction in the comments!