They’re making a new movie about the origins of Jesus H. Christ. But before you ask- No, it’s not The Gospel According to Biff. But he would be awesome in that, hey? Unfortunately, it’s called Sweet Baby Jesus and it’s about “Joe” and his pregnant girlfriend “Mary” traveling to Bethlehem, Maryland so she can give birth there. Sam Rockwell has signed to play Joe and trust me, he’s too good for this movie.
Need proof? It’s directed by Peter Hewitt. The director of Garfield.
If that’s not enough, his costars are Bette Midler (as a presumably sassy innkeeper) and Kim Cattrall, who will play Mary’s mother. Mary herself will be some British pop star that I’ve never heard of… Her name is Pixie Lott and she’s taking the role after Britney Spears dropped it, which should say something about her.
I’ll do a quick search and… Damn! Now we’ve got a story.
My research tells me she plays all of her own instruments and she writes her own songs! Just look at how talented she is! Pop stars can act! Just look at… Oh. Don’t look at anything. And don’t stare directly at Crossroads.
Has any young pop star actually done some good acting? Puzzle it over and post your thoughts in the comments section.