That's Not My Name!: Popular Baby Monikers Coming To An Infant Near You!
Baby names are something that are discussed at length amongst Pajibans on the Facebook. It has been determined that we will soon be in a world of adults named Klasseigh, Jerreigh, Hashtag, Fail Whale, and Tard Cat. I’m not sure if this is a leap forward, but some of the popular names for babies are also coming from more pop culture sources. These kids are going to Google their names one day and end up wading through the nastiest fanfic this side of “Cupcakes”. (Do not Google fanfic “Cupcakes”. If you do, don’t read it. Gah.)
I can’t imagine explaining to my kid where I came up with their name if I chose most of these.
“Well, sweetie, I watched The Hunger Games and was so taken with one of the murderous children that I named you Cato.”
“There was a little girl in a battle for her life. She was killed by one of the other children. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RUE!”
“There were these popular books about sparkly vampires and then they made movies about them! It was super sweet. I named you after the large, sort of doltish vampire with the huge biceps and the six-pack, so sexy…Now go clean your room, Emmett.”
“Oh, Katniss! You are so funny! Now go practice another 8 hours with your bow and arrow in case we need you to fight to the death.”
“Damn it, Primrose. I don’t understand why you decided to dance at The Pink Panther. I was really hoping you’d learn to make goat cheese on a hippie commune.”
“If it’s good enough for Nic Cage’s weird goth kid, it’s good enough for you, Weston.”
“Adele is a popular singer. Her voice brings people to tears and she sang the best James Bond theme ever in the history of the world.” “I love you, Mom.” “And I love you, Aria.”