It seems like no matter how bad the remake idea, someone’s always getting pissed off at me for adding to the remake insult by crapping on your fond 80s memories. Voltron? Come on! I’m sorry if I suggested that the combination of six lions to form a giant-ass robot was similar, in my mind, to Transformers. You’re absolutely right! A giant transforming robot has absolutely nothing to do with the Transformers. And after watching the opening of “Voltron,” the cartoon, I just don’t know how I kept myself from tracking down the entire series and marathoning it over the next few days.
Anyway, Voltron and World of Warcraft lovers and haters alike can at least agree on this: Bringing back the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, again, is a terrible idea. Right? Right? We’re all on the same page here, aren’t we? Two animated series, a live-action series, and four movies is enough, right?
No sir! Despite the fact that the last movie, TMNT was a mere two years ago, it’s apparently time for a reboot. And that, of course, means origins story! Because what we’ve all been dying to know for decades now is where those goddamn turtles and that sewer rat came from.
In the new TMNT film, the producers are returning to live-action (after the CGI movie of 2007 fizzled at the box-office, because, obviously, the problem was in the format. And now, they’ve even found a writer: John Fusco. Fusco wrote the two Young Guns films back in the 80s (remakes in 3 … 2 … 1 …), as well as the Viggo Mortenson starrer, Hidalgo. But he’s certainly not out of his depth here: Fusco is also a trained martial arts expert, which makes him the perfect choice to write a kid’s movie about ninja-fighting turtles in a half shell.