Sunsets Are Beautiful. Newborn Babies Are Beautiful. This... This Is F*cking Spectacular!
File this one under “never gonna happen, but fun as fuck to talk about.”
Simon West, who historically has a pretty terrible director (Con Air, The General’s Daughter, Lara Croft: Tomb Raider), was recently doing a press tour for the upcoming Jason Statham/Ben Foster film, The Mechanic. It’s a film that I truly do hope is good, because it looks like fuckballs of fun and it also stars Tony Goldwyn and Donald Sutherland, both of whom I love.
Regardless, West was asked by Crave about 1997’s cheezetacular crapfest Con Air (I mock, but I’ve seen it roughly 8 billion times, because it’s ridiculously watchable and entertaining). Here’s his response:
“I’d like to do Con Air 2… It’d be great. It’s a matter of getting everybody together. There’s so many people involved and it’s about getting everybody to agree. But I’m going to bring it up to Nic. I’m going to put a bug in his ear about it. If the two of us want to do it, we’ll go after the others.”
Of course, on the one hand, Nic Cage will literally act in anything at this point. The Sorcerer’s Apprentice? Bangkok Dangerous? Christ, he’d act in a Vagisil commercial if it’d pay the bills. And John Cusack was in 2012, so you know where he’s coming from these days. And Colm Meaney was in War Games: The Dead Code, so, you know… he’s got free time.
On the other hand, the rest of the cast — John Malkovich, Ving Rhames, Danny Trejo and all the crapulent actors who were the other bad guys… everyone except Steve Buscemi and that maniac who played Swamp Thing — um, you know, fucking died.
There aren’t that many people left to get together. I suppose you could just recycle the same plot but put it on a boat or a bus or a train or, I don’t fuckin’ know, a friggin’ Toys ‘R’ Us (WHICH WOULD BE AWESOME FILLED WITH AWESOME AND BURIED IN MORE FUCKING AWESOME).
Anyway, it’s unlikely, but it’s fun that West loves the project enough to keep dreaming about the sequel. I love every shitty second of Con Air, so the project gets my damn vote.
AND BECAUSE I LOVE YOU:
(apologies for the abundance of caps locking… blame Joanna)
(source: Dark Horizons)