Two videos for you tonight, folks. I’d say it was because I was feeling generous, but — while the first video (from branded) will amaze you, the second will completely stupefy you.

The first one is actually a couple of years old, but it’s the first I’ve seen of it, and if the YouTube count is any indication, it hasn’t exactly gotten around yet (unless the YouTuber ripped it off of someone else’s YouTube video, which is a total douche move). Anyway, with Iron Man 2 in theaters, it’s culturally relevant at the moment, and by God, it’s just too cool not to present. Here you go: Iron Man vs. Iron Giant

Now, this second video I caught on Vulture today, and Jesus Mother of Mary Chain, someone needs to put these little girls in some goddamn clothes, like, yesterday. This is pathetic, and the parents who allowed their daughters to do this ought to have their breeding capabilities taken away.

Am I being melodramatic? I dunno. You tell me.

(If you made it more than 43 seconds into that video, and you’re over the age of 18, please go ahead and turn yourself into the authorities).

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.