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Bless Me Father for I Am Stupid

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Industry | January 26, 2010 |

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Industry | January 26, 2010 |

A few months ago, TK wrote up a bit about Paul Bettany’s next project with director Scott Stewart called Priest. It didn’t look horrible with the little tidbits that had leaked out: based on a comic book series, it’s a western in which a priest wages war on vampires. Casting news looked good: Christopher Plummer, Madchen Amick, and Paul Bettany as the eponymous ass kicking warrior priest. Maybe some pulpy fun, right?

Of course, last week Stewart and Bettany took a tag team dump on movie goers with Legion, a testament to mediocrity that should fit right in with the made for television junk tossed onto the SyFy Channel at midnight on Saturdays, so the duo’s credibility is sort of running low even before taking into account just how much Stewart altered the source material.

Priest (the film) is a post-apocalyptic future western involving a priest fighting vampires.

Priest (the comic book) is set in the old west and involves a priest fighting renegade angels and zombies.

This is apparently a difficult concept to grasp for Hollywood, but the word “adaptation” is not a synonym for “Has the same title.”

Stewart assures us though that “Min-woo [the writer of the original graphic novels] came out and visited us over the summer. He’d read a translation of the script and came out and was really, really pleased with what he saw. We talk about the graphic novels as being the past, and [the film version of] Priest is kind of the future.”

Dude, all that means is that the check cleared, just like how American actors go do terrible commercials in Japan for the easy check. Sean Connery doesn’t really love Biogurt, he just loves money a lot more than he cares about how stupid he looks on television in a country he never goes to. Want to use my likeness in Pakistani STD commercials? Bidding starts at $50.

(source: SciFi Wire)

Steven Lloyd Wilson is the sci-fi and history editor. You can email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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