Those of you who came of age during the Grunge-era may find more to the trailer for Pearl Jam Twenty than just a music documentary edited together by Cameron Crowe. In a way, it feels like watching high school and college and grad school and your 20s just float over the crashing guitars of “Given to Fly.” There’s the “Jeremy” video, there’s Eddie Vedder and Jeff Ament and Stone Gossard, and their various stages of hair length. There’s the new guy, Matt Cameron, who has been with the band for 11 years. Look: There’s Chris Cornell. Goddamn, how’d he get old? Remember the first time you heard “Even Flow,” and how you never understood the lyrics: “Sittin’ butt naked on a porcupine made of concrete,” and how you used to shout made-up lyrics in parking lots. And in between the shots of Pearl Jam on tour, the music videos, and David Lynch, there’s your high school girlfriend, and there’s the friend you lost in your 20s, and there’s your wife and there’s the night you went camping, drank too much Evans Williams, and spent all morning puking in a sink.
It all taste like cheap beer and cigarettes, and look at you watching the trailer with your Starbucks, your low-cal muffin, and your starred out curse words. What the fuck happened? When did you become the asshole 15 years older than anyone else in the mosh pit? Wait? Do they even have mosh pits anymore, or did some government safety council find a way to get rid of those, too?
Fuck the man, I’m going to go get blazed and listen to “Yellow Ledbetter.” Just as soon as I take my kid to preschool.