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Don't Imagine Anything, You'll Become Brave as Hell.

By TK Burton | Industry | November 10, 2009 |

By TK Burton | Industry | November 10, 2009 |

Sometimes the best news isn’t about what’s going to happen, but rather about what’s not going to happen. For once, the wheels of the remake machine have ground to a halt. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, according to the good people at Latino Review, Steven Spielberg’s Oldboy remake has died in the womb.

Apparently, Spielberg and Dreamworks have been meeting with Mandate, the Korean production studio to get the rights sorted out, and it just ain’t happenin’. It was reportedly to be a direct adaptation of the original manga comic, and not a remake of Park Chan-wook’s 2003 twisted mindfuck of a masterpiece. But regardless, you will not see Will Smith (Spielberg’s choice for the lead) aw-hell-nawing up a remake anytime soon.

Hopefully ever.

You see kids? Sometimes, good things do happen. It’s nice to know that just tossing two of the biggest names in Hollywood into the mix doesn’t mean it’s going to happen. And while, given the remake of the incredible Infernal Affairs into Scorsese’s absolutely brilliant The Departed or Verbinski’s remake of Ringu into The Ring, we know that good remakes can be done, Smith in Oldboy just seemed fundamentally wrong.

I say good fucking riddance. Chop its head off, bury the fucker and salt the earth where it lays.

Secret Ballot | Len Wiseman to Direct Nocturne

TK Burton is the Editorial Director. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.