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North Korea Is Now Threatening Warfare Against the United States Over a F*cking Stoner Comedy

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 22, 2014 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 22, 2014 |

While North Korea continues to deny that it was behind the cyberattacks against Sony that led to the release of thousands of documents and emails and, ultimately, the cancellation of the Christmas Day release of The Interview, it stands behind whoever it did it, claiming that they stand behind their “highly righteous action,” although they claim they have no idea who the hackers are.

Still, North Korea is upset with President Obama for “recklessly making the rumor” that North Korea was behind the Sony cyberattack, and they are now threatening unspecified actions against the United States, according to a statement from the official Korean Central News Agency.

The National Defense Commission, led by [Kim Jong Un], warned that its 1.2 million-member army is ready to use all types of warfare against the U.S.

The army and people of the DPRK [North Korea] are fully ready to stand in confrontation with the US in all war spaces including cyber warfare space,”

“Our toughest counteraction will be boldly taken against the White House, the Pentagon and the whole U.S. mainland, the cesspool of terrorism, by far surpassing the `symmetric counteraction’ declared by Obama,” said the commission’s Policy Department in a statement carried by the official Korean Central News Agency.

Threats of attacks against the United States aren’t exactly new for North Korea because they are crazy-making crazy people, but I think it’s worth remembering here that this entire ordeal originated with A FUCKING STONER COMEDY that’s getting, at best, mixed reviews. This is the dumbest reason to go to war since the time America and Britain almost went to war over a goddamn pig.

Source: BBC

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.