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3D Car Movie Starring Nic Cage? Sign Me Up!

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | August 31, 2009 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | August 31, 2009 |

Just after posting a story suggesting that My Bloody Valentine’s Patrick Lussier might be the ideal choice to take over the Halloween franchise in the wake Rob Zombie’s departure and the franchise’s turn to 3D (Lussier, after all, edited H2), it turns out that Lussier already has his next two pics lined up. In fact, Lussier has apparently become something of a 3D horror movie go-to guy, although with My Bloody Valentine 3D, part of the reason why it was so fun was because I couldn’t tell if Lussier was intentionally creating an awful movie (that happened to be extraordinarily fun) or if he was simply incompetent. He’s developing Condition Dead 3D now, with is about a government organization responsible for dealing with zombies (3D Zombies! Hellfuckingyeah!)

And, because no week would be complete unless Nic Cage signed on to another movie (he has a movie coming out quarterly for the foreseeable future), Lussier’s next project is Drive Angry a 3D movie starring Cage. The movie, based on a script co-written by Lussier and his My Bloody Valentine partner, Todd Farm, is about a man “driven by rage who is chasing the people who killed his daughter and kidnapped her baby. The vendetta/rescue spins out of control as the chase gets bloodier by the mile, leaving bodies strewn along the highway.”

So, it’s essentially Fast and Furious meets Kill Bill in 3D. And I hate to say it, but you know what: If it’s coo coo batshit wild-haired snarly thugga 40 ounces to freedom NicCage, Drive Angry could actually be a lot of bad motherfucking fun. The man has made nothing but ass for the last five years, and I think he’s about to turn the corner and head back to Crazy Town. And I dig Crazy Town Cage all the way to goddamn China.

Get me a shovel, wenches. Let’s do it.

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.