The latest rumor rumbling across the Internet (a phenomenon to which I am gleefully and knowingly contributing) is that there is a chance that “Star Trek” will be returning to television at some point in the near future. While the films of the series have never really broken the bank at the box office until JJ Abrams released Star Trek XI: The Undiscovered Lens Flare, the television series have always been the real heart of the series. Hundreds of episodes, telling hour long science fiction stories for the better part of half a century. There’s just more depth there, more introspection.
So when someone tells me that there might be a new series on its way, I get a tad excited. Then I read the actual details, as tossed at the fan by AICN:
Fuller tells AICN exclusively that the two Bryans, who have long (but separately) contemplated new Star Trek TV series, have discussed the possibility of pooling their resources to take a new corner of Gene Roddenberry’s multiverse to the small screen. Hopefully J.J. Abrams and Les Moonves will give them the keys to Starfleet HQ.
Yes, the entire rumor is based on a dude telling a website that he had a conversation with another dude about making a television series. Sure the two dudes in question are Bryan Fuller and Bryan Singer, so it might be a tad more likely than the conversations I’ve had with my cat about single handedly bringing back “Firefly,” but its only different by degree, not category.
Frankly, I think this is just an elaborate exercise in revenge by Bryan Singer. See, he wanted to do a “Battlestar Galactica” reboot, but it got put on hold and then Ron Moore made it his baby. But Moore made his bones on “Star Trek,” so now Singer is trying to dig up Moore’s roots and burn them in a cleansing fire.
And apropos of nothing, do you know what Singer’s first credit on IMDB is for? A film called Street Trash in 1987, with a credit as a grip. I don’t know what a grip is, but I assume it means that Singer is responsible for such memorable quotes as these:
“Lady, what’s the difference between you and a tape recorder except that I can’t shut you off?”
“Baby, I ain’t sure you don’t got a cock.”
“I’d like to know what you’re doing with all that chicken in your pants.”
“Hey, com’on, I read like old people fuck.”
Now re-read all of those quotes in Captain Picard’s voice.