Details are scant so far, but it looks as though MTV is developing a television series based on George Romero’s classic Dawn of the Dead. At first I wondered why they’d not just remake the original, Night of the Living Dead, since it’s essentially the same premise, but then I remembered: Dawn of the Dead takes place in a shopping mall. And this is MTV. And, well, it all makes sense now.
Just think of it: 1) Imagine the product placement opportunities. In a mall! Zombies who wear Gap clothing! Zombies who eat Hot Dogs on a Fucking Stick! Hot Topic Zombies! Zombies who love novelty gags at Spencers. The possibilities are endless. Moreover, a zombie television series set in a mall gives MTV a chance to roll out another gaggle of giggly teenagers, who can text each other the zombies’ whereabouts (“Madison. Stay away from the Abercrombie! Their clothes are unflattering on your figure. Plus, zombies!”)
Yeah. I have no idea how this makes sense as a series. At least one that might last longer than four or six episodes — the original did feature slow zombies, so perhaps they can stretch it out. I see an episode already that revolves around mall walkers! The good news, however, is that if they stick with the Romero source material, lots of obnoxious teenagers will die. Unfortunately, so will the rapidly deteriorating reputation of Romero for future generations, a reputation that Zack Snyder actually managed to do justice to in his Dawn of the Dead remake.
Here’s hoping they set it in a Canadian mall and Robin Sparkles makes a cameo appearance.