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You Can't Polish a Turd, But You Can Put a Bow On It

By Brian Prisco | Industry | February 16, 2010 |

By Brian Prisco | Industry | February 16, 2010 |

According to our pals over at Slashfilm, a rumor is abound that Meryl Streep has signed on to join Russell Brand in the Arthur remake. But get this: she’s gonna be playing the Hobson role. That’s right. The role that won Gielgud gold is now going to go to our resident goddess of the screen.

This is just going to further encourage people that Russell Brand is funny. He’s not. He’s just … he’s not. Oh, I know. You stupid sorry sonsabitches are gonna start whining and pointing to Podcasts and television series and … you know, I just don’t care. Russell Brand is not funny. And the fact that he thinks he’s even worthy enough to drink the cigarette-butt filled dregs left behind Dudley Moore’s alcoholic genius is probably the funniest thing I’ve ever heard.

I like Streep. But Hobson’s shtick was watching this refined butler lose his shit. Streep bitched it up hardcore in The Devil Wears Prada but that’s not the same as refined. But she’s Meryl Streep. She could fucking play Thor if she wanted to, and nobody’s gonna stop her.

But if Brand really wants to get a butler he deserves, he should end up with Sean Connery. Connery’s dry sarcasm would better match Brand’s clueless babbling. Or even Dustin Hoffman, for God’s sake. But Streep?

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