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Matt Damon Sticks Foot in Mouth, Chews It Off at the Ankle

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 13, 2011 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 13, 2011 |

In an interview with GQ this month, Mr. Matt Damon — all around good guy, purveyor of Apples, and occasionally a homeless meth addict — took off his shoe, stuck his entire foot in his mouth, and gnawed it off with his molars while discussing Tony Gilroy’s screenplay draft for Bourne Ultimatum, essentially calling it garbage.

I don’t blame Tony for taking a boatload of money and handing in what he handed in. It’s just that it was unreadable. This is a career-ender. I mean, I could put this thing up on eBay and it would be game over for that dude. It’s terrible. It’s really embarrassing. He was having a go, basically, and he took his money and left.

Sure, out of context, that sounds like a real jerky thing to say about the guy who will be directing the next Bourne film, the one without Matt Damon. But pull quotes fail to take into account Matt Damon’s presence, the aura of charm and decency and awesomeness he exudes. If Katherine Heigl had said it obviously it’d be a shitty thing to say, but Matt Damon? He doesn’t throw people under the bus: He gently places them under the front wheel, kisses their foreheads, and generously releases the brake.

To be fair, Damon did follow up with an apology, writing GQ: “This is between me and him. So saying anything publicly is fucking stupid and unprofessional and just kind of douchey of me.”

Yes, yes it is. But “fucking stupid and unprofessional” is what keeps the Internet alive. So, thank you. Also, we’ll always have this, Matt:

And this:

(GQ via Videogum)

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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