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More from the Do Not Want File

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | July 6, 2009 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | July 6, 2009 |

A couple of rumors are brewing about two potential, but completely unrelated sequels. And as we all know, rumors are fact until completely disproved. And these aren’t fun rumors.

The first is a continuation of what we’ve been hearing for a while — that Indy V is in the works. Shai LaBeouf mentioned a few weeks ago that Spielberg had “cracked the story” in mid-June. And now comes word, according to CBS’s The Insider (a low-rent Entertainment Tonight), that Harrison Ford is set to reprise his role for the 5th time. Filming wouldn’t begin on the sequel until next year, and it wouldn’t be released until 2011, by which time Ford will have died of old age (he’d be 69 and crumbly).

That should be fun. When’s the last time an actor died during a shoot?

In even more depressing news, Bob “JUST a bit outside” Uecker mentioned during the broadcast of a Cubs game at Wrigley field that he’s been approached for a fourth Major League movie. Uecker gave absolutely no details, but here’s a few things you can be one: 1) It’ll happen; 2) Charlie Sheen won’t return; 3) it’ll probably go straight to DVD; and 4) it’ll blow green donkey dicks.

Something to look forward to, folks!

You know what? There’s no bottom of the barrel left to scrape, Hollywood. At this point, you’re actually scraping the Earth’s core, and if you’re not careful, you’re going to trigger an apocalyptic earthquake. But think of all the new ideas for movies it would bring!

Movies with the Highest Body Count | The Most Offensive Fat Movies

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.