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Worst. Heterosexual. Ever.

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | July 17, 2009 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | July 17, 2009 |

That’s it! Hugh Jackman is the worst heterosexual ever, or the most secure one. Sure, he snarls it up as Wolverine, but he spends a quarter of his time on Broadway doing musicals like Carousel and I think he’s even been rumored to star in a Hollywood version of Guys and Dolls, with Guy Ritchie in the director’s chair (a rumor that’s probably bunk). Also, there’s this (at the 1:00 mark):

Although, let’s be fair. That’s less gay than it is humiliating.

Anyway, because the man is unbelievably secure in his masculinity, he’s also gearing up to star in Avon Man, which is what it wounds like. Written by Kevin Bisch (Hitch), Avon Man is about a small-town used car salesman who gets laid off from his job and turns to selling cosmetics. When things for the town get dicey, he then recruits the locale’s male members into Avon Men.

I like the guy’s chutzpah. You certainly don’t see Christian Bale mixing up his John Connor roles with musicals and comedies that call his sexuality into question.

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Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.