With remakes of Predators and Conan the Barbarian heading to theaters soon and a Red Sonja remake in development, it’s only a matter of time before Hollywood shuffles through the entire Arnold Schwarzenegger catalog culminating in a True Lies/Jingle All the Way mash-up where our hero is tasked with hunting down Santa Claus and blowing his sled out of the sky.
But before we get that far, we first have to hit the Schwarzenegger high points, and 1985’s Commando is the latest Arnie movie to get the remake go-ahead. David Ayer, who wrote Training Day and directed its poor man’s version, Street Kings, will write and direct the Commando remake.
No one has been cast in the lead yet, but Ayer plans to take a more Bourne-y approach, with a sleeker, more compact hero with more tactical strength than actual brawn. My guess is that he’ll keep the original plotline about a retired military dude tracking down his kidnapped daughter (otherwise, it wouldn’t really be a remake). Of course, Taken has already done that, but with fewer expected explosions.
I’m really starting to miss the steroid era in action films. Hire Jason Statham, though, and all is forgiven. The bigger question is: Who is going to replace Alyssa Milano or Rae Dawn Chong? Maybe Milano can come back and play the Dawn Chong role?
The good news: This gives me another chance to show you the 160 Greatest Arnie Quotes of All Time.