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Guillermo del Toro Submits 'Justice League' Script with 10 Percent More Chocolate

By Brian Byrd | Industry | November 26, 2014 |

By Brian Byrd | Industry | November 26, 2014 |

Notorious Hollywood recluse Guillermo del Toro is back in the game. Finally. The “Future Projects” section of his Wikipedia page was in danger of dropping below 1,200 words.

According to esteemed comic book fansite Forbes, GDT submitted his script for a Justice League: Dark movie (tentatively titled Dark Universe) to Warner Bros. for weekend reads. Studio reaction - which, given the superhero genre’s appeal right now, will probably be “Whatever, here’s the key to the McDuck vault” - should follow after the Thanksgiving holidays. If feedback is positive, there’s a chance the studio might possibly consider thinking about moving forward. Maybe.

Dark Universe chronicles the New Black Panther Party’s rise to power under the leadership of a charismatic Kenyan Socialist named Barack Hussein Obama. Probably. I don’t have first goddamn clue what this is about, guys. As someone who enjoys sports and women and outdated stereotypes, I don’t have time to keep up with what you sub-basement-dwelling comic books nerds want turned into a movie next. I assume Dark is just the standard Justice League roster with 10 percent more rich Swiss cocoa? All I know is if you live in a state with a SEC school or believe Confederate flags are heritage not hate, this film will not play in your area.

Sigh…fine: the Justice League: Dark team (consisting of John Constantine, Madame Xanadu, Deadman, Shade, the Changing Man and Zatanna) fights supernatural adversaries deemed unfit for the traditional Justice League. So basically Ghost Hunters: The Movie. Hmm, I know the perfect lead.

SNL Ghost.jpg

Dark Universe stars absolutely no one yet and premieres in theaters north of the Mason-Dixon Line a while from now. Or never.