For $110, You Can Now Own 1,000 Shares of MoviePass
If you have any faith whatsoever in the future of MoviePass, now is the time to invest. Personally, I think it’s probably going to go under, and fairly soon, but if you’re a gambler, have I got a stock for you!
MoviePass just hit a new low. It is selling for 11 cents a share. Eleven pennies. For the price of a cup of coffee at Starbucks, you could own about 30 shares of Moviepass. Want $1,000? That’ll cost you a measly $110. And just think: If MoviePass pulls out of this tailspin, you could be a hundredaire!
Why did it drop, anyway? Why has MoviePass lost 98 percent of its value? Well, AMC’s new Stubs program didn’t help, and I gotta say, the new rules MoviePass continues to implement every single week don’t seem to help, either. Two weeks ago, it was surge pricing. And over the weekend, I had to take a picture of my ticket stub in order to continue to be able to use MoviePass. What better way to show the world that you’re a cheap MoviePass-subscribing bastard than stepping out of line after purchasing your ticket to take a selfie with your stub?! “Hang on honey,” you say to your date. “I just have to take a picture with this ticket real quick.”
There’s also this:
Helios and Matheson has scheduled a special meeting of shareholders for July 23 at the Empire State Building in New York City to increase the number of the company’s authorized common stock from 500 million to 5 billion and approve a one-time reverse stock split.
It’s been a while since I studied securities in law school and I am actually not sure about how this works, but if you take an 11 cent stock and dilute it by 1,000, what are you left with? Something that’s less valuable than the lint in your belly button, right?
As it is, you can take that $10 subscription fee and buy 90 shares of MoviePass a month. Personally, however, I believe that the paper that the movie stub is written on is more valuable than stock in MoviePass.
I think what I’m saying is this: There’s never been a better time for MoviePass subscribers to go see Sorry to Bother You. It may be one of the last times you can take advantage of your subscription.
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