WTF? 'Fast and Furious' 9 is Going to be Rock-less, Statham-less and Thus Garbage
I am a woman of simple tastes and simple pleasures—one of them being the Fast and Furious franchise. I can’t help it, I think they are delightfully dumb and I very much enjoy watching pretty people race and crash cars, and joke around in a manner that is pleasing to middle-America. I also enjoy whatever the lead single from whatever F&F movie is currently out, and that also means I very much like drinking too much wine and putting on “See You Again” while I text my friends my thoughts on Paul Walker’s movie oeuvre. (His best role was by far and away Meet the Deedles. Discuss amongst yourselves. Wait, that’s a lie, it’s She’s All That.)
So it is with heavy heart that I tell you that The Rock (and Jason Statham) will not be returning to the franchise for the 9th installment, which means it’s probably going to suck. Here’s the confirmation from the man himself:
Could this be a wink wink, nudge nudge type of thing? Totally!
Probably not though. Look, The Rock seems like the type of dude who likes everyone, but you can see in the way he talks about Dom aka Vin Diesel aka “candy-ass” there’s still a bit of tension there. Or maybe it’s just me because I love drama.
Don’t forget The Rock, my fake boyfriend, called out Vin a few years ago for reasons, and it kicked off a feud and somehow Tyrese volunteered for one as well.
Move over Bette and Joan!
Anyway, clearly The Rock is going to wait and mete out any further dish about this over the entire press run for Hobbs & Shaw, so expect to hear more on as we approach the release date (July 26, 2019, it’s not like I have a countdown clock or anything….)
Am I bummed that I won’t see The Rock or Jason Statham in the next F&F movie? Absolutely. Does the fact that Idris Elba, whom I also consider to be my boyfriend, is going to also be in Hobbs & Shaw make up for this disappointment?
Oh, you better believe it, friends.
All I’m saying is that F&F 9 is going to lose some of its sparkle by not having two of my boyfriends in it. They can probably go get more sparkle, maybe by bringing on Henry Golding, or Winston Duke, or hey, even Glen Powell, because Scott Eastwood is just not going to be able to cut it, ok?
In better, more Rock related news, get excited because the first trailer for Hobbs & Shaw is released tomorrow. In the meantime, enjoy this clip of The Rock, on set of Hobbs & Shaw, making wishes come true for children:
Header Image Source: The Rock instagram
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