In case you missed it last night, NBC announced the worst idea ever. They are planning to reborquelize the classic teen romantic comedy Say Anything, which ironically stands against everything that Lloyd Dobler valued. HE DOESN’T WANT TO SELL ANYTHING BOUGHT OR PROCESSED, and a sequel to Say Anything in the form of a NBC sitcom is the Velveeta cheese of processed entertainment.
Cameron Crowe will not stand for this fuckery.
John Cusack is likewise offended by the series.
Ione Skye hasn’t weighed in yet, because she’s busy writing Yiddish Children’s books (and no, I’m not kidding).
But OBVIOUSLY Cameron Crowe and John Cusack wouldn’t be involved in this mess. Look at them! They have souls (or at least Cameron Crowe does. Cusack’s soul may have been consumed by ultra-liberal, bananapants outrage).
Crowe’s ability to kill the project is in doubt, however. Though he wrote and directed the film, 20th Century Fox owns the rights to the title, which means they can do whatever they hell they want with it.
On the other hand, if Crowe (and Cusack and Ione Skye) raise enough of a fuss, they might be able to effectively kill it because God knows, anyone who was a fan of the original movie, or of Cameron Crowe, or of the John Cusack of yesteryear, would be perfectly happy to refuse to watch the series out of general principle.
Plus, I pity any fool dumb enough to sign on for one of the leads, which is tantamount to a scab crossing a picket line. WE WILL SHAME YOU TO YOUR CORE. So go ahead an try it, Minka Kelly or Justin Bartha types. The minute you sign that dotted line, you best go ahead and delete your Twitter accounts, because we will raise hell on your timelines. Do you need us to burn down your social media accounts, BECAUSE WE WILL BURN DOWN YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA HOUSE.
DO NOT FUCK WITH THE UNCOOL.