Fox is in a strange position heading into the 2015-2016 season. The network boasts several critically acclaimed comedies and appears to be the first major broadcast network to realize black people enjoy television shows centered around black culture. What’s next, Fox? A series directed and written by women? Better curb those liberal tendencies before Rupert Murdoch realizes his network is off message heading into an election year.
Despite the success of Brooklyn Nine-Nine, New Girl, Empire and to some extent, Gotham, Fox finds itself beset by declining ratings and aging properties. The Mindy Project and Glee are done; American Idol got its walking papers Monday. Bones, Family Guy and The Simpsons eat dinner at 4 pm, and not one of Fox’s freshman dramas outside of Empire and Is Batman Gonna Be In This Or What? lived to see a second season.
Fox needs new hits. And they may have actually found a few based on the trailers for their upcoming series. Fall offerings seem promising, led by a Tuesday night block that includes the new Ryan Murphy horror anthology series Scream Queens (Fox screened a trailer for advertisers during Monday’s upfront presentation but hasn’t yet made it available online) and promising new comedies Grandfathered and The Grinder. The midseason options, however, should be jettisoned into space as a deterrent to aliens concerned about the emergence of rival intelligent life in the universe.
FALL Minority Report
Cast: Stark Sands, Meagan Good, Laura Regan, Fez Entire Premise in One Tweet: Fox made a series based on the Tom Cruise-Steven Spielberg flick. It looks OK. #analysis Best Worst Line: “The government wanted to hide us from the world…but I don’t want to hide forever.” Best YouTube Comment: “The people who are making trailers these days need to die out… The reason you dont get that money u want, IS BECAUSE UR SHOWING US ALL IN THE SERIES!” Number of episodes before cancellation: Full season
Cast: Morris Chestnut, Jaina Lee Ortiz, Gabrielle Dennis, Cli Che Entire Premise in One Tweet: Tough-as-nails female cop partners with brilliant suave medical examiner to solve cases each /buried by avalanche of tropes Best Worst Line: “Rosie, put a leash on this chick, man!” Best YouTube Comment: “If they reveal Morris Chestnut’s character is Cookie Lyons brother, and crossover, this show is as good as gold.” Number of episodes before cancellation: 7
Cast: Rob Lowe, Fred Savage, Mary Elizabeth Ellis, William Devane Entire Premise in One Tweet: Another lazy-ass lawyer show about a guy who…whoa some of these jokes are really funny Best Worst Line:
“Hey, what’s going on in my office?”
“Your brother’s telling war stories, come in and sit on the floor.” Best YouTube Comment: “Are we finally going to learn the name of the waitress?” Number of episodes before cancellation: Full season
Cast: John Stamos, Josh Peck, Paget Brewster, Christina Milian Entire Premise in One Tweet: Uncle Jesse finds out he has a son, and that his son has a daughter. Hijinks ensue. Best Worst Line:
“Why do you have a meat thermometer in her butt?”
“People are meat.” Best YouTube Comment: “Well, I have to say… GILF. Still don’t think it’s gonna see a second season. :)” Number of episodes before cancellation: Full season
MIDSEASON The Frankenstein Code
Cast: Rob Kazinsky, Dilshad Vadsaria, Adhir Kalyan Entire Premise in One Tweet: Lieutenant Bookman gets thrown off a bridge, is brought back to life as a smedium-shirt wearing crossfitter cop Best Worst Line: “Let me give you some advice: second chances can be a real monster.” Best YouTube Comment: “AWESOME!!! Cast and crew members they are go getters glad to be apart of this” Number of episodes before cancellation: 7
Cast: Tom Ellis, Lesley-Ann Brandt, Lauren German, DB Woodside Entire Premise in One Tweet: What if the worst person in Christian mythology is actually a semi-compassionate retiree who drives around LA delivering lame quips? Best Worst Line:
“Lucifer Morningstar: is that a stage name?
“God given I’m afraid.” Best YouTube Comment: IT’S A TIE!
“Why do these shows always have a sidekick. I don’t care about the female cop.”
“THE DEVIL IS NOT YOUR FRIEND EVER…. EVIL.” Number of episodes before cancellation: 13
Cast: Hank Azaria, Alex Borstein, Nicholas Gonzalez, Judah Friedlander Entire Premise in One Tweet: Seth MacFarlane tops off his Scrooge McDuck vault with a painfully unfunny, poorly drawn Family Guy ripoff set in a town on the US-Mexico border Best Worst Line:
“If you were born here, who won the WNBA championship last year?
“The Phoenix Mercury.”
“No American would know that, you’re coming with me.” Best YouTube Comment: “+FOX YOU SUCK. This is the worst pile of DOG CRAP I’ve ever had the displeasure of stepping in! In 20 years no one will even be watching TV, and when your CEO is homeless begging for money in the street, I hope he remembers the day he greenlit this abortion of a show and regrets every moment of his pathetic life leading to that point. This is coming from a LEGITIMATE MARINE who has fought for his country in two tours of duty. I lost so many brothers over in Iraq, and I see this garbage and know they died for nothing. Congratulations, you are a disgrace to your country.” Number of episodes before cancellation: 220