Today’s Really Important Rumor comes by way of Drew McWeeny (aka Moriarty) over at HitFlix, who is reporting that Bradley Cooper is the front-runner to take the role of The Green Lantern.
I’ve just spent the last hour or so on the phones, tracking down a rumor I heard, and HitFix can exclusively report that Bradley Cooper is now one of the guys most likely to don the suit and slip on the power ring as The Green Lantern for director Martin Campbell.
The angle most movie blogs are taking is the “Who is Bradley Cooper?” one, which is kind of silly because, even before The Hangover comes out in June, I think most folks know who Bradley Cooper is. We all know him as Ben, from Wet Hot American Summer, of course. Although, he was also in some film called Wedding Crashers, and in an obscure television show, “Alias.”
Anyway, I refuse to go on my Green Lantern rant again, but I would have to say: If you have to make the movie (and you don’t; it’s not too late to kill it), you could hardly do worse than Cooper as Hal Jordan. He’s likably smarmy, a good-looking wiseacre. And God knows that the Green Lantern needs some sort of personality.
Jesus. A magic ring. I think this century has already seen enough films about rings.
“Oh, Mr. Lantern. There’s a bad man about to attack me! Point that big shiny ring in my direction!
“Sorry, lady. Can’t help you. That man is wearing a yellow raincoat.”
“No! No! It’s custard!”
“Oh, well. In that case, I’ll just shoot my little green ray over in that direct … ah, fuck lady, It is yellow, you bitch. Mother Fuck! That smarts. Next time, try getting attacked by a man wearing a purple raincoat, mmmmkay?”