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The Most Controversial Statement of the Day

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 16, 2009 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 16, 2009 |

I’m going to say something controversial here; something that has absolutely no business being controversial, but for reasons beyond my apparent simple-minded understanding of beauty, it is around these parts, particularly in the comments section. It is this:

Jennifer Aniston is one hell of an attractive lady.

Why is this not common knowledge? How can this possibly be disputed? Whose fucked up, skewed sense of attractiveness suggests that this can’t be so? By any objective standards, Jennifer Aniston is gorgeous. If you can’t see that, there’s something seriously messed up in your head — you are stank-ass rank funky wrong.

Does Aniston make good movies? Oh, God no. She makes some of the very worst. Is she a good actress? Rarely, but she’s had her moments (The Good Girl, Friends with Money). Is it annoying that she’ll forever be connected to both a long-running sitcom and a relatively short-lived marriage? Absolutely. Does that make her unattractive? Give me a fucking break. Rail on her acting ability, her seriously poor choice in scripts, or her obsession with not being obsessed with tabloid coverage, but to call her unattractive just makes you sound silly. And maybe even a little petty.

That said, her upcoming movie, Bounty Hunter, alongside Gerard Butler, sounds down right atrocious, like a really bad, knock-off romantic comedy version of Mr. and Mrs. Smith. In it, Butler — a bounty hunter — finds out that his ex-wife is his next target. Expect a bunch of bad comedy of remarriage hijinx.

Here’s the new movie poster for the movie. There’s a lot you can say about it — including a very weird airbrush job which makes her hips and torso completely disproportionate — but the one thing you can’t say with any honesty is that Aniston is not ridiculously pretty.


Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here, follow him on Twitter, or listen to his weekly TV podcast, Podjiba.

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