I’ve had a terrible couple of days, kids. We’ve been without a toilet since Wednesday evening and found out last night that all drains don’t lead to the ocean, but directly under our house instead. So please enjoy these pieces of news accompanied by sexy gifs, because I don’t want to bring y’all down too much.
Johnny Depp was set to play Whitey Bulger in the film Black Mass. I wasn’t on board with this piece of casting and now it looks like Depp isn’t either. Depp wanted his one-third of the $60 million budget for his salary and bailed when Barry Levinson’s production couldn’t comply. Understandable? Sure. Still, it makes me happy!
Perhaps Depp left to reprise his role as The Mad Hatter in the sequel to Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland? Word is James Bobin (The Muppets) will be directing the sequel, which is still in the early stages. Depp is also set to return for Pirates of the Caribbean 5 at some point. Ugh. I didn’t like the first Alice and anything past the second Pirates is too long and brain-numbing for my tastes.
M. Night Shyamalan is still making new movies, like his upcoming untitled family drama about forgiveness. For some reason, and I didn’t realize this, people are itching for a sequel to Unbreakable. Have these people seen what Shymalan has transformed into? He’s a grotesque, twisted version of the promising auteur we saw with his first few films and has become obsessed with surprise endings and stoking his own ego in lieu of proper stories. Leave the Unbreakable sequel to our imaginations, ya butt.
Kevin Eastman, co-creator of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, has said that the Michael Bay-produced movie is going to be basically awesome. Eastman also added that Paramount wants the movie to be similar to The Avengers. Um. Okay.
Much like the titular doll, the Chucky franchise just won’t die. The possessed Good Guy doll returns in Curse of Chucky, where he is mailed to the home Nica (Fiona Dourif). Nica’s mother has passed away and she and her sister Barb (Danielle Bisutti) are taking care of the loose ends. Meanwhile, Barb’s daughter finds solace in the terrifying embodiment of evil contained within Chucky. Who in the effing eff would be comforted by that heinous-looking abomination of a doll?