Biz Break: Jane Got A Gun Continues Its Slow Descent Into Clusterf*ck Hell As Bradley Cooper Nopes Right Out.
Let’s play catch up with the drama, shall we? Natalie Portman is producing and starring in Jane Got A Gun. Portman is playing Jane Hammond, a woman who is forced to protect herself and her home from a band of outlaws pursuing her husband. Jane turns to an ex-lover she hasn’t seen in 10 years to help her protect against the outlaws out to finish off her husband. Every source I’ve looked at has conflicting character names and different actors being set for the roles, but I can tell you that Michael Fassbender was originally set to play the ex-lover, Joel Edgerton was to be the outlaw husband, and Lynne Ramsay was directing. Fassbender dropped out of production, Edgerton moved into the ex-lover role, and Jude Law became the outlaw husband.
THEN, Lynne Ramsay dropped out of the production, Jude Law followed suit, and Gavin O’Conner took over directorial duties. Noah Emmerich took on the outlaw husband role, Edgerton stayed put, and Bradley Cooper took on the role of the leader of the outlaws (I think). Seriously, one site says Law was the husband and another says the outlaw leader and I’ve typed this over four times and I’m still confused. THE POINT IS COOPER IS OUT. If the set is half as confusing as attempting to figure out who was supposed to play which role, I completely understand dropping out. Maybe listen to the universe, Jane Got A Gun, and give up. I AM.
Less confusing is the news of Daniel Radcliffe snagging the lead role in Tokyo Vice. The movie will follow Radcliffe’s reporter as he locks horns with a yakuza crime boss. It’s based on the true story of Jake Adelstein and his experiences with crime boss Tamadasa Goto. You can start reading up on the true bits via Wikipedia, if you like.
Apparently I can’t help giving you news that induces furious rage inside of my tiny body. Kelsey Grammer will play the bad guy in Transformers 4. He joins Mark Wahlberg and Stanley Tucci in the sh*tty franchise’s reboot/sequel. Grammer will play Harold Attinger, a counter intelligence agent who is a dickbag. Here’s hoping one of the Transformers accidentally unloads all of its coolant on his head.
I don’t think I can handle anymore news today, youse guys. Since I didn’t provide it yesterday, I’ll end on the much-requested CapAss gif.