You Know What? Fine. Film A ‘Twins’ Sequel. See If I Care.
Today’s film industry truly loves taking iconic films from decades past and revisiting them to create franchises, doesn’t it? You’ve got your Jurassic World, your Blade Runner 2049, your various Alien projects, The Matrix, Escape From New York, Star Wars, Star Trek, all your live-action Disney movies, and, of course, Triplets.
Yes, Triplets. The sequel to Twins.. It’s still happening. From EW:
“We are just now working on Triplets,” Schwarzenegger said. “That is on top of the list, for me. Because I’ve been trying to do that for 20 years. Ivan Reitman (the director of Twins) believes in it. Danny DeVito believes in it — who always believed in it — and Eddie Murphy believes in it. It’s going to be terrific! So, we are looking forward to that.”
Twins, you’ll remember (not from watching it, I imagine, but from all the jokes made at its expense over the past few decades), is a movie in which Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny Devito are long-lost twin brothers, born out of a genetic experiment designed to create the perfect human being. Arnold plays that guy, and Danny Devito is all the stuff that got left over. Eddie Murphy, presumably, would play their missing third brother, who is… I don’t know, the smart one, maybe? I guess that all depends on what kind of script Josh Gad (yes, really) wrote.
Okay, that’s it. You win, Hollywood. Of course you’re making this movie! Why wouldn’t you be making this movie? Everything the industry has ever done has been leading up this point, and all the critical acclaim and actual thought-provoking work that’s been done in the world of cinema was just a nice cherry on top of this accursed moment. Of course. And I bet it’ll be funny, too!
I suppose it could always be worse. They could be working on a Junior sequel, which was a movie about mpreg featuring Arnold and Devito as fertility experts. Although… let’s not give anybody ideas, huh.