Well, it’s official — Affleck as Batman is no longer the hotly discussed part of this movie, because if this is to be believed, and it should, because it comes by way of an official Warner Brothers press release, Zack Snyder’s Batman Vs. Superman movie has crossed the line from weird into flat-out f*cking lunacy.
Jesse Eisenberg will be your next Lex Luthor.
Chew on those mind grapes for a few minutes.
Oh, and Jeremy Irons will be playing Alfred the Butler, and honestly, at first I thought I read the release wrong, and that Irons was Lex, which would TOTALLY WORK. But no, here it is, in all of its glory:
BURBANK, CA, January 31, 2014 - Warner Bros. Pictures announced today that Jesse Eisenberg has been set to star as Lex Luthor and Jeremy Irons will play Alfred in the upcoming Zack Snyder untitled Superman/Batman film. The dual announcement was made today by Greg Silverman, President, Creative Development and Worldwide Production, and Sue Kroll, President, Worldwide Marketing and International Distribution, Warner Bros. Pictures.
Snyder stated, “Lex Luthor is often considered the most notorious of Superman’s rivals, his unsavory reputation preceding him since 1940. What’s great about Lex is that he exists beyond the confines of the stereotypical nefarious villain. He’s a complicated and sophisticated character whose intellect, wealth and prominence position him as one of the few mortals able to challenge the incredible might of Superman. Having Jesse in the role allows us to explore that interesting dynamic, and also take the character in some new and unexpected directions.”
The director added, “As everyone knows, Alfred is Bruce Wayne’s most trusted friend, ally and mentor, a noble guardian and father figure. He is an absolutely critical element in the intricate infrastructure that allows Bruce Wayne to transform himself into Batman. It is an honor to have such an amazingly seasoned and gifted actor as Jeremy taking on the important role of the man who mentors and guides the guarded and nearly impervious façade that encapsulates Bruce Wayne.”
So there’s that. Hands down — hands f*cking down — the most insane superhero casting of all time. I’m serious. A 30-year old with a permanent stammer playing a genius scientist megalomaniac bent on world domination, Superman’s greatest and most ubiquitous foe. JESSE EISENBERG.
I keep waiting for the shoe to drop, for the punchline. I’ve checked and re-checked the trades five times since I started writing this, and nope. It’s still showing up as the truth.
You are not dreaming. This is the really real world. Where Mark Zuckerberg is going to play Lex Luthor. Which is kind of poetic, in its own warped, the world-has-no-meaning, god-is-dead kind of way.