5 Nuggets of Knowledge You Can Use to Ruin Someone Else's Day
It often feels like the trade news that we run on this site is specifically designed to piss many of you off. That’s not the real intention, and I’ve struggled to find ways in which news round-ups can be useful to our readers instead of harmful. I think I’ve finally hit upon it: News You Can Use to Ruin Someone Else’s Day. Say a co-worker of yours is unnaturally giddy this morning; maybe he got laid. Maybe you want to wipe that obnoxious smirk off his face. Maybe he walks into your cubicle while you’re trying to sleep off a hangover and says, “Yo bro! Up and at ‘em, Adam Ant. It’s a beautiful day out!” And you, because you can’t stand his insufferable optimism, drop one of these nuggets of knowledge on him and turn that fucking smile upside down.
You remember that Highlander remake that’s been stuck in development hell for eons? Well, it’s stuck no more. Now it has a screenwriter: Melissa Rosenberg, who has written all the Twilight films. Also, Justin Lin (Fast and Furious: Tokyo Drift) is attached to direct. How’s that for a gut punch? (Collider)
Anyone read Josh Bazell’s novel, Beat the Reaper, about a mobster-turned doctor? It’s pretty great, actually. You know what’s not great? Having DJ Caruso (Eagle Eye) direct the adaptation. Leonardo DiCaprio may even star, so says The Playlist
If you haven’t scrubbed it from your memory yet, we recently spoke of an Annie re-imagining produced by Will Smith and Jay-Z, which would star one of Will Smith’s irritatingly adorable devil-spawn: his daughter Willow. Things just went from bad to worse: There’s now a front-runner for director: Ryan Murphy, he of “Glee” fame, he who directed Eat, Pray, Love and Running for Scissors. (Deadline)
Ricky Gervais apparently still has some pull with NBC on the show that he owns, “The Office,” and he’s recommending Will Arnett as a regular on the show once Steve Carell leaves. That would’ve been awesome … three years ago. But now I think that Arnett has completely exhausted the abrasively oblivious know-it-all. Plus, he’s a show killer. Maybe that’s not so bad, as “The Office” needs to be put to rest. (Ricky Gervais)
This is actually good news, but your dumb co-worker probably won’t realize it because he probably liked Iron Man 2 more than the original, so here’s how this conversation will go:
You: “Did you hear that Shane Black is up for writer and director of Iron Man 3?
Obnoxious Co-Worker: “Shane Black? Who the fuck’s that? What happened to the Swingers dude? Vegas, baby, Vegas!”
You: “He’s making a movie based on Disney’s Magic Kingdom or something?”
OCW: “Really? Raaaad, dude! That’s gonna be the bomb!”
You: “Yeah. Uh, totally. Anyway, Shane Black was the guy behind Kiss Kiss Bang Bang? That movie where Val Kilmer played Gay Perry.”
OCW: “Wha? Homo? They got some sort of artsy-fartsy director to take over Iron Man. What’s Iron Man gonna do, like, sip lattes and blow dudes?”
You: “Uh, yeah. Something like that. You have a nice day now.”