What, you don’t want me running your highest-rated show anymore, AMC? The one that I helped launch? The one that took off, in part, because of my good name and its association with one of the best movies of all time, Shawshank Redemption? Oh, sure, The Walking Dead is better since I left, but that’s only because I was biding my time. Remember Sophie? Yeah, I was going to wait until, like, the 5th season to finally spring that on the audience. Can you imagine the effect it would’ve had on a viewership that had been lulled literally to sleep by three seasons of long walks in the forest? The shock would’ve have split them in half.
So, you know what? Go to hell. I went to TNT, and I made a new show, and you know what else? I brought Jon Bernthal along with me, since you guys thought it was so important to get rid of him. Do you know how many more seasons I could’ve dragged out the Shane and Rick tension? I had mapped out nine seasons of that, including a season in which they had become lovers.
But whatever. I got gangsters now. We’re talking Los Angeles, 1947. It’s like Boardwalk Empire, only on TNT, so, you know, we can say “sh*t” in really pointed ways, and show really sexy silhouettes of femme fatales. There’s a lot killing in the new trailer for the show, but don’t worry, dear audience members. That’s actually every death from the first three seasons (we film the deaths first, and then sprinkle them throughout the series for color). Jon Bernthal and Jeffrey DeMunn are going to have long walks in the L.A. streets, and they’re going to talk through their problems. The people that die? They are collateral damage, the people that try to keep them from reaching their karmic centers, in what I like to call my 1940s therapy drama.
Yeah, it’s going to get real up in here. Real f**king slow.