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When Will They Ever Learn? The Top Five Horror Movie Rules and the Daylight Trailer

By Cindy Davis | Lists | June 16, 2011 |

By Cindy Davis | Lists | June 16, 2011 |

What is it about horror movie people—why are they so frakking stupid? People who start off seemingly sensible, suddenly lose their minds, forget all the rules and we’re left screaming at the screen: “Don’t go in there! Don’t leave the knife on the counter! Don’t open the door! Don’t let him/them in!” Where does the common sense go?

Just in case you, dear Pajibans, ever find yourself in a horror movie-like situation, here are some of the hard and fast rules. Live them, learn them, never, ever forget them:

5. Don’t let a stranger into your house, especially when he (they) come(s) knocking at night. If someone comes knocking at night, have a weapon nearby when you answer the door. (Me, I’m pretending I’m still asleep.)

4. Don’t go camping at deserted campgrounds where legend has it that a killer ran rampant. The same goes for exploring any abandoned or haunted house, cave, mine shaft, old building, etc. If it’s abandoned, there’s a reason.

3. If you are hot, you probably have no chance anyway, but if you are somewhere with a bunch of pals and people start disappearing or you find one of your friends dead, leave immediately. There is no need to investigate.

2. If there is a killer in your house, don’t hide in stupid, dark places from which there is no escape. Not in the closet. Not under the bed. Not behind a curtain. Get the fuck out and take the weapon(s) with you. If you injured the killer, don’t drop and leave the weapon on the floor next to him. If you are being chased (especially in the woods) by a killer, don’t look back and don’t stop to hide behind a tree. Just keep on mothafuckinrunning.

1. Never, ever (don’t even consider it) pick up a stranger.

Honorable Mention: Clowns = bad.

What’s great about this Daylight trailer is that we’re drawn into that feeling of growing dread with merely images and music. You don’t know exactly what’s going on; clearly something strange and bad, but what?

You may have figured out that a cardinal rule was broken, yes, the one about picking up strangers. A pregnant Irene (played by Alexandra Meierhan, who was pregnant in real life) and Danny get lost on their way to a wedding. They stop to ask a stranger for directions and agree to give him a ride; of course everything goes downhill from there. Though it sounds run of the mill for a horror film, director David Barker (Afraid of Everything) is said to have re-imagined the genre.

Here’s a second clip where there’s more of a sense of how things got started:

I may have to peek through my fingers, as usual, but I definitely want to see this. Daylight also stars Michael Godere (“Mercy, The Bronx is Burning”), Aidan Redmond (I Sell the Dead) and Ivan Martin (The Orphan Killer) and will be in theaters July 15, 2011.

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