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Tina Belcher-Approved: the 30 Best ‘Bob’s Burgers’ Butts

By Nadia Chaudhury | Lists | October 3, 2014 |

By Nadia Chaudhury | Lists | October 3, 2014 |

I love Bob’s Burgers almost as much as Bob’s Burgers loves butts, and I REALLY love Bob’s Burgers. So in honor of the show’s season five premiere on Sunday (WATCH IT), here are the 30 best quotes concerning rear ends.

Teacher: “Jimmy Junior, no! It will make you want to touch each other’s butts!”
Jimmy Jr.: Too late.”
Tina: “I don’t need a love potion to want to do that stuff with you.”

Tina: “It was lunchtime at Wagstaff. Touching butts had been banned by the horrible Headmaster Frond. Suddenly, Tina Belcher appeared in the doorway. She knew what she had to do. She grabbed Jimmy’s butt, and changed the world.”

Tina: “Everyone touched each other’s butts, and it was great.”

Louise: “We know you’ll push on a cow’s butt for half an hour without asking for help. Gotta have that butt all to yourself?”

Louise: [whispers] “Butt.”

Bob: “Linda, there are animal anuses all over our walls!”
Linda: “Just think of them as cute little rumps.”

Tina: “I never realized baseball had so much butt touching.”
Louise: “That’s how they communicate, Tina. It’s like Braille, but with butts.”
Gene: “Read my butt!”

Jimmy Jr.: “I’ve got a butt. Look at it.”

Logan: “Shut your butts, coconuts.”
Louise: “But you said I couldn’t, but I’m doing it.”
Logan: “But I want your butt to shut.”
Louise: “Oh, listen to the hum of my butt.”

Kingshead Island boy: “I heard she could tie a cherry stem with her butt.”

Tina: “Tell them to push their butts together.”

Manatee Puppet: “Listen to this one, always up my butt.”

Tina: “Robots? But that does give me an idea for my new next erotic friend fiction: ro-butts.”

Dancer: “I’ve got your love testometer right here.”
Tina: “That goes in the butt bank.”

Tina: “Why is my butt wet?”
Gene: “Butts get wet, Tina! It’s what they do!”

Tina: “Let’s go somewhere where the 16 of us can be alone. If your butts fall off, pick them up and put them back on. It wasn’t easy dating 15 zombies at once. Oh, wait, yes, it was. Thank you, zombie boyfriends. Soon, I couldn’t tell where I ended, and the zombies began. Butts, butts. I love butts.”

Bob Belcher: “I just drank from a lizard’s butt!”

Linda: “Oh, put some mistletoe on my butt and kiss it, Bobby.”

Louise: “Luckily, her whooping butt is in remission.”

Tina: “The hand wants what the hands wants. I can’t tell where your back ends and your butt begins.”

Tina: “I need fresh faces—and fresh butts.”
Gene: You’ll take the butts you’re given and you’ll like it!”

Gene: “Let’s find Butt Treasure!”

Tina: “She can tell us the next trend in teen fashion.”
Gene: “I’ll bet it’s butt hats, hats for your butt!”

Linda: “Yup, that’s his butt’s voice.”

Tina: “I have a photographic butt memory.”

Linda: “Oooh…what did’ya get?”
Fanny: “It’s a skirt but I’m going to wear it as a dress so you can see my butt.”
Linda: “Buttdress, I like it.”
Fanny: “Buttdress, buttdress, golly.”

Louise: “Just when I think I’m out, those cheeks just pull me right back in.”