Movie studios unleashed a slew of trailers for highly anticipated summer movies on a captive Super Bowl audience last night. Maybe you watched a few between food runs and SCREAMING AT THE TELEVISION BECAUSE PETE CARROLL IS THE DUMBEST HUMANOID SINCE AUSTRALOPITHECUS LUCY! CHRIST!
Right, movie trailers. We’re talking about trailers. Sorry. Rather than simply embed all the Super Bowl previews below and lounge as the clicks come rolling in, we went the extra mile for you, the busy reader, who doesn’t have time to watch 30 entire seconds of video on a Monday morning. You all are busy, important people with kids and jobs and 2048 games to finish. You want GIFs. You NEED GIFs. So GIFs you shall have.
The upper-crust billionaires among us with whole minutes of spare time lying around can click the film’s titles to access the full preview.
Going to assume Jurassic Pratt’s badass vest is the only reason he’s able to tame the most lethal killing machines in Earth’s history:
You only have to be faster than the other guy:
Vietnam was INTENSE!
I bet every visitor to Tomorrowland has their measles vaccines:
I love this scene because they made it using practical effects rather than relying on CGI. Seriously, like 20 stuntmen died (thankfully, they had Nationwide insurance):
I like to imagine that Colin Firth’s Kingsman character is the same guy he played in The King’s Speech:
Seventh Son ran a trailer last night so I’m obligated to include something from this inevitable career killer. Here’s a GIF of a bear:
Fifty Shades of Grey
Fun with reordering frames:
Arnold diving headfirst into spinning rotor blades is a metaphor for something, I just can’t find it yet:
This was Brady’s longest completion of the night. YOU’RE ALEX SMITH WITH BETTER TEETH YOU WHINY CLOWN!
The Divergent Series: Insurgent
This scene looks cool. Don’t really have anything else to say about this movie.
Pitch Perfect 2
The joy Packers fans experienced watching Seattle derp away a second Super Bowl was likely mitigated by the sight of their star linebacker dancing around in a sequel to a musical:
Pretty sure Seattle fans ran through this entire gamut during the game’s last two minutes:
Enjoy buying more toys, parents: